Soulless

âme damnée

Yoongi's anemic reflection mocks his very being. His tired slanted eyes match the slow beating of his heart, his aching body and his ghostly skin makes him look more miserable by the hour, he is lifeless. His usually sunken lips are now bowed into a grimace as if every little noise would be tumultuously defending to his fragile echo. The days that seem to stretch on forever are rather jejune, void of color and soul. Being alone with a broken heart strikes him as the worst possible feeling he could ever experience.

The very second Kwang had turned his back to Yoongi, duffle bag hooked over his shoulder, the moment his happy hazel eyes narrowed in hatred and fled Yoongi's field of vision, his entire world crumbled down to nothing. From within the ruble left behind, a few friends and co-workers had tried to reach out to him, as a way of comforting him, an attempt to distract Yoongi from the splinter that had wedged itself painfully into his back, sitting as a constant reminder of the happiness that has left him. Yoongi declined any attempted interactions.
The constant avoiding and missed calls brings him to this present moment, where his best friend is making him take a shower, "It's been weeks you pig", those were Hoseok's exact words. Hoseok has the best intentions by far, he was the only person who knew Yoongi wouldn't pick up the phone, so he marched himself into Yoongi's barren apartment, takeout in hand, and made himself at home.

"I don't hear water running!" Hoseok shouts from just beyond the door, seeming to stumble Yoongi out of his thoughts.

Hoseok really means no harm, he's just bad with words, Yoongi knows this. He's known Hoseok for some time now, having seen him rise from a Junior Associate at a mid range office supply firm, to now a salesman (his partner to be specific), Yoongi has seen the boy grow. He watched as the college kid, with a nose too big for his face and shirts too loose on his shoulders, developed over six years into an unexplained happy-go-lucky man, with a laugh too loud and a smile too wide. Yoongi is convinced Hoseok would dye his hair crazy colors to best represent his positive vibes, if their boss wasn't so disquiet about professional dress attire; they sit in uncomfortable office chairs and price out staplers and printers all day, the worrisome attitude about looks is beyond Yoongi.

Flicking on the rusted faucet of the shower makes Hoseok shut up, finally. Yoongi waits a while, he delays having to move as much as possible, with his heels dug into the tile and his knees locked, he is avoiding motion at all costs. Once steam starts to seep into the glass, inching coverage over his reflection, Yoongi deems himself required to start to bathe.
Bad idea.

As soon as he steps into the shower, he's met face to face with his ex-lovers favorite soap. Instantly Yoongi weakly whimpers as a sob threatens to jump out of his sore throat, his eyes burning from so many helpless nights of weeping. He closes his reddened globes and sniffs, the smell of the shampoo he began lathering his fading artificially grey locks reminding him of times when he and Kwang would giggle and snicker, cleaning each other's hair and kissing gently under the waterfall of droplets. His lip quivers at the memories flooding through him, his face wet from not only the shower water raining harshly at him, but his own tears drenching his sunken skin.

There's a soft knock at the door as Yoongi begins to towel down what remaining wetness is sticking to him, the air smelling of distant smiles and drenched with humidity.

"Hyung, I have clothes." Comes a soft voice

Yoongi grunts in response, loosely tying the soaked rag around his waist and creaking open the door. He's met with eyes full of pity, a sad smile ghosting Hoseok's lips as he holds out a gray shirt and baggy blue gym shorts. Yoongi knows he might be dramatic and ridiculous for the way he's acting but in truth, he really believed Kwang was his soulmate. Yoongi accepts the pajamas with a hum, nodding to Hoseok as a silent "thank you", and clicks the door shut again.