4 days after your death - Luna

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{TW} Talk of self harm and heavy grief 


𝙷𝚎𝚢 𝙳𝚒𝚐𝚐𝚘𝚛𝚢...𝚒𝚝𝚜 𝙻𝚞𝚗...𝚆𝚎 𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞... 

𝙸 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎𝚗'𝚝 𝚜𝚎𝚎𝚗 𝙶𝚎𝚘𝚛𝚐𝚎 𝚜𝚖𝚒𝚕𝚎 𝚒𝚗 𝚍𝚊𝚢𝚜, 𝙻𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚕𝚜 𝚜𝚘 𝚏𝚊𝚛 𝚊𝚠𝚊𝚢 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚏𝚊𝚔𝚎, 𝙸 𝚌𝚛𝚢 𝚊𝚕𝚖𝚘𝚜𝚝 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚢 𝚗𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝. 

𝙶𝚎𝚘𝚛𝚐𝚎 𝚜𝚊𝚢𝚜 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚘𝚗𝚕𝚢 𝚝𝚒𝚖𝚎 𝙸'𝚟𝚎 𝚕𝚘𝚘𝚔𝚎𝚍 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚗 𝚠𝚎 𝚠𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚎 𝚊𝚏𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚖𝚞𝚖 𝚍𝚒𝚎𝚍... 

𝙸 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢 𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞, 𝚛𝚎𝚖𝚎𝚖𝚋𝚎𝚛 𝚑𝚘𝚠 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚢𝚝𝚒𝚖𝚎 𝙸 𝚏𝚎𝚕𝚝 𝚜𝚊𝚍 𝚘𝚛 𝚞𝚙𝚜𝚎𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚙𝚞𝚕𝚕 𝚖𝚢 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚍 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚕𝚊𝚙 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚝𝚛𝚢 𝚝𝚘 𝚋𝚛𝚊𝚒𝚍 𝚖𝚢 𝚑𝚊𝚒𝚛? 𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝚋𝚛𝚊𝚒𝚍𝚜 𝚠𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚗𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚐𝚘𝚘𝚍 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝙸 𝚊𝚕𝚠𝚊𝚢𝚜 𝚏𝚎𝚕𝚝 𝚋𝚎𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚊𝚏𝚝𝚎𝚛.

 𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚊𝚒𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚕𝚎𝚏𝚝 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚜𝚊𝚢𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚐𝚘𝚘𝚍𝚋𝚢𝚎 𝚋𝚎𝚌𝚊𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍𝚗'𝚝 𝚋𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚜𝚎𝚎 𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚏𝚊𝚌𝚎𝚜 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝙸'𝚍 𝚍𝚘 𝚊𝚗𝚢𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚘 𝚜𝚎𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚜 𝚊𝚐𝚊𝚒𝚗. 

𝙹𝚊𝚎𝚕 𝚔𝚎𝚎𝚙𝚜 𝚜𝚊𝚢𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚢𝚘𝚞'𝚍 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚝 𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚝𝚘 𝚖𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚘𝚗 𝚜𝚘 𝚜𝚑𝚎'𝚜 𝚊𝚕𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚢 𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚘𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚑𝚊𝚛𝚛𝚢 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝙸 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝'𝚜 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞'𝚍 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚝... 

𝙸'𝚟𝚎 𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚃𝚛𝚊𝚒𝚗𝚠𝚛𝚎𝚌𝚔 𝚘𝚗 𝚛𝚎𝚙𝚎𝚊𝚝, 𝙸 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠 𝚒𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚏𝚊𝚟𝚘𝚛𝚒𝚝𝚎. 

𝙸 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍𝚗'𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚝 𝚖𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚑𝚞𝚛𝚝 𝚖𝚢𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚏 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞'𝚍 𝚊𝚜𝚔 𝚖𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚜𝚖𝚒𝚕𝚎, 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚜𝚊𝚔𝚎, 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝚜𝚖𝚒𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚕𝚜 𝚒𝚖𝚙𝚘𝚜𝚜𝚒𝚋𝚕𝚎. 𝙸 𝚜𝚕𝚒𝚝 𝚖𝚢 𝚠𝚛𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚜....𝙸 𝚏𝚎𝚕𝚝 𝚐𝚞𝚒𝚕𝚝𝚢...𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚜𝚗'𝚝 𝚎𝚗𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚝𝚘 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚢 𝚜𝚘 𝙸'𝚖 𝚜𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚖𝚢𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚏 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚊 𝚗𝚎𝚠 𝚙𝚎𝚛𝚜𝚘𝚗, 𝙸 𝚌𝚊𝚗𝚝 𝚕𝚘𝚜𝚎 𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎𝚘𝚗𝚎 𝚎𝚕𝚜𝚎. 

𝚆𝚎'𝚛𝚎 𝚐𝚘𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚘 𝚠𝚒𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚌𝚞𝚙 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚢𝚘𝚞, 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚎, 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠 𝚒'𝚍 𝚗𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚋𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚔 𝚊 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚎. 

𝙿𝚎𝚘𝚙𝚕𝚎 𝚔𝚎𝚎𝚙 𝚊𝚜𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚒𝚏 𝙸'𝚖 𝚘𝚔, 𝚍𝚘 𝙸 𝚕𝚘𝚘𝚔 𝚘𝚔? 

𝙸 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎𝚗'𝚝 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚗 𝚊𝚋𝚕𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚜𝚊𝚢 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚗𝚊𝚖𝚎- 𝙸 𝚌𝚑𝚘𝚔𝚎 𝚞𝚙 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚢𝚝𝚒𝚖𝚎 𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎𝚘𝚗𝚎 𝚖𝚎𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞. 

𝙸 𝚌𝚊𝚗𝚝 𝚋𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚊𝚗𝚢𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚎, 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚢𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚕𝚜 𝚏𝚊𝚔𝚎. 

𝙸 𝚜𝚒𝚝 𝚊𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚎𝚍𝚐𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚏𝚘𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚝 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚜, 𝚑𝚘𝚙𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚙𝚛𝚊𝚢𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚠𝚛𝚘𝚗𝚐 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞'𝚕𝚕 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝...𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔, 𝚝𝚎𝚕𝚕 𝚞𝚜 𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚒𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚊 𝚙𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚔...𝚎𝚊𝚌𝚑 𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚒𝚝 𝚜𝚒𝚗𝚔𝚜 𝚒𝚗 𝚍𝚎𝚎𝚙𝚎𝚛 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚍𝚎𝚎𝚙𝚎𝚛, 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎𝚜 𝚖𝚎 𝚜𝚘𝚋. 

𝚈𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚕𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚑 𝚎𝚌𝚑𝚘𝚎𝚜 𝚝𝚑𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑 𝚖𝚢 𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚍 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚢 𝚍𝚊𝚢, 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚜𝚖𝚒𝚕𝚎 𝚒𝚜 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚘𝚗𝚕𝚢 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚔𝚎𝚎𝚙𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚖𝚎 𝚜𝚊𝚗𝚎 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝚒𝚝 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚕𝚜 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞'𝚟𝚎 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚗 𝚐𝚘𝚗𝚎 𝚜𝚘 𝚕𝚘𝚗𝚐- 

𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚘 𝚍𝚒𝚜𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚎𝚊𝚛, 𝙸 𝚌𝚊𝚗 𝚑𝚊𝚛𝚍𝚕𝚢 𝚛𝚎𝚖𝚎𝚖𝚋𝚎𝚛 𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚕𝚘𝚘𝚔 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚕𝚘𝚘𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊𝚝 𝚊 𝚙𝚒𝚌𝚝𝚞𝚛𝚎... 

𝙶𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚝 𝚖𝚢 𝚙𝚊𝚛𝚌𝚑𝚖𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝚒𝚜 𝚜𝚘𝚊𝚔𝚎𝚍 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚝𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚜.

 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠 𝚠𝚎 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢 𝚗𝚎𝚎𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎...𝚆𝚎 𝚗𝚎𝚎𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚘 𝙶𝚎𝚘𝚛𝚐𝚎 𝚠𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚙𝚕𝚊𝚢 𝚐𝚞𝚒𝚝𝚊𝚛 𝚊𝚐𝚊𝚒𝚗...𝚜𝚘 𝙹𝚊𝚎𝚕 𝚠𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚐𝚘 𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔 𝚝𝚘 𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚗𝚘𝚛𝚖𝚊𝚕 𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚏...𝚂𝚘 𝙸 𝚍𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚕 𝚜𝚘 𝚊𝚕𝚘𝚗𝚎...

 𝙸 𝚋𝚎𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚜𝚝𝚘𝚙 𝚠𝚛𝚒𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚋𝚎𝚏𝚘𝚛𝚎 𝚖𝚢 𝚙𝚊𝚛𝚌𝚑𝚖𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝚍𝚒𝚜𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚐𝚛𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚜 𝚏𝚛𝚘𝚖 𝚝𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚜...𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝙲𝚎𝚍𝚍𝚢...

 - 𝙻𝚞𝚗𝚊

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