Can You Hear That? Mental health book

Why me?

"Can I ask a question?" I looked at Hayley straight in the eye.

"Yes?" She replied.

"Why me?"

Hayley was the women I spoke to about all my problems, I guess you could call her a councillor, but she didnt speak to me like I was her client, she spoke to me like a friend or a family member would.

Hayley always wore a skirt, and it would always be mid calf length. No matter how cold it was outside, what ever season or weather, she would wear a mid calf legthed skirt. Most of the time they would be denim but one time, I remember her strolling into the 'time to talk' room wearing a hand made one with all different fabrics, she pointed out one particular square "look ducks" I acted as if I cared (which I didn't). She always wore red lipstick to, even if it didnt match her chlothes, I think she eats it too with the amout she has on her teeth. Her hair is very short, bob like infact, but it was always so clean and shiney. I remember looking at her thinking how can she have gorgeous hair but a terrible fashion sense. She also had a lazy eye but she hid that behind her reading glasses which she wore all the time, even if she wasnt reading, even if we went to the coffee shop to get hot drinks. All in all she was a tall, slim, unfashionable, amazing women who eats lipstick! Im kidding she doesn't eat lipstick.

She stared at her hands on her lap, then eventually looked up,

"You know, a lot of people feel how you do right now, but alot of people give up..."

I stop her in her tracks,

"I dont want to give up, but its times when I feel down and im all alone and they tell me to hurt myself"

Hayley exhales, "Who does?"

I reply with "I dont know" but I do know, I tell my self to hurt my self, I cant feel like this anymore, I want to be 6 foot under. No one will understand not even hayley and she is a professional.

"You know you can tell me anything sweetheart"

I hated when she called me a pet name, it made me feel as if I was fragile, which I am.. but I dont like to look at it in that way.

I look at the clock, "oh, look at the time, we have gone over time agian."

"Ill see you on Wednesday, ok hunnie?" Ughhh another pet name.

I nodded and shut the door, put my gloves, coat, and scarf on and headed for the exit of the sad place.

Come back next Tuesday to see chapter 2, where I tell you what mental health issues I suffered with.