Hate You Love You/ K. Sakusa (On haitus)

Shifted

Sorry for such a late update! I've been busy with school and I needed a small break. Sorry if things seem slow with Y/N and Sakusa, I just want to make this a realistic as possible. I will be changing the description, cover, and title for this book since I came up with a better storyline. It won't be that much different from the original, Y/N is still going to be a party animal but she will have more than what people see. You'll see the new description in a bit so you can get a better idea. I have never been so triggered before, I downloaded Grammarly and it helps a lot but it kept changing Sakusas name to Sakura. But anyways I hope you enjoy~

The night was dark, stars and moon shining brightly over the city. Y/N sighed and leaned back in her seat as she drove through the empty streets. Music played loudly on her radio as she drove to her destination. It was around 1 in the morning, but she couldn't stay still in her bed. She stopped at a red light, her eyes wandered to the side seeing a bar. It looked nice, just the right amount of people, but she knew better to go drinking by herself at 3 in the morning. Sestu would kill her.

Her car soon stopped before a kids' park. It had a playground with a sandbox and all. Y/N turned off her car and got out. Her feet lead her to the swings, she sat down as her hands wrapped around the rusted metal that held her up. She used to swing here with Sestu, laughing as they tried to go as high as they could.

Y/N sighed, her feet flat on the ground. It seemed she outgrew the swing, like many other things. She was pretty sure the swing would give with her weight, so she stood up and walked back to her car. She didn't know what she wanted or needed at the moment, but she felt like she was missing something. Her heart felt heavy and her stomach empty. She had started driving again, to where she didn't know at the moment. It had been almost an hour and she was still on the road, somewhere outside of town with music blasting on her radio.

It had been about a week when she stopped going with Sestu to her work. During that time Y/N tried looking for an apartment, but it was either too far or just crazy expensive. Sestu was living back at home like she was, leaving the apartment finding to Y/N since she had more time. Atsumu still called her daily just to talk and check if she was alright, Bokuto and Hinata also messaged her every day. She had to admit that they were quite something, their high spirits and never-ending energy never failed to make her laugh and smile.

But even then, she was feeling empty. A void in her chest that she doesn't know how to fill. She hasn't been too crazy since she got back, not drinking or clubbing since getting drunk with her family. It was for the best really, she needed to sober up at some point. And it wasn't healthy either. It has been tempting though, to just drink the night away, all doubts and fears drowned by the burning alcohol.

Before she knew it, she was back at the MSBY sharehouse. Her eyes were slightly widened in surprise as she stared out her window at the building. She didn't even realize she had driven all the way there. It was like her body was moving on her own, turning off her car and getting out. There she stood at the front door, mind blank.

What was she even doing?

A frustrated sigh left her lips as she put her hands over her face. This void in her was suffocating to the point she started to get teary-eyed. She fell to her knees and started to cry. It was such an overbearing feeling that she didn't know what to do with herself.

She just felt so out of sync with everything. So out of place. The people around her seemed to be in flow with their lives already, having their paths paved in front of them. But she was just so lost. She was scared of growing but also scared of not having her life together. What did she want to do with her life again? She didn't even know anymore.

It was like she was in some sort of limbo. Floating between everything, somewhere dull and dark. It was like the world was passing her by, not waiting to give her a chance to catch up.