𝐅𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐌𝐞 | 𝐇.𝐏

act i : scene ii

one word describes hogwarts, home. well, i can't say it's really home if the chosen one's around, he always brings danger and since the time he put a foot in this castle, danger's in every corner.

now, everyone's at the great hall. eating, talking, and staring. he still did it despite draco's arm wrapped around my shoulder.

"what's wrong? you're kinda quiet today," draco asks in concern tone, everybody knows that i usually talked an awfully lot but not today. i still looking at harry's direction and draco following my gaze. "why's potter looking at you?"

"dunno, maybe he's jealous"

"jealous?"

"y'kno 'cause i got a very handsome white albino ferret as a boyfriend" i joke causing draco shoves me slightly but keep me in his arm. i smile at him made him smile genuinely, a smile that rarely he shows or wore. he kisses the side of my head.

i still don't get it why potter's looking at me? or my prediction is true that potter's actually looking at my boyfriend? nope, definitely not.

dumbledore announced hogwarts has been chosen to host the triwizard tournament, nothing surprises me, i already knew it 'cause i might've known something that no one knows.

when the beauxbatons girls arrive, i look at draco to check on him if he's looking at someone or something they had. but thank god, he's not, he just keeps talking to blaise about quidditch. i accidentally looking at potter's direction, and he's still staring at me. what a creep.

when the durmstrang boys arrive, i expect nothing more than just students. but viktor krum is there. viktor is somewhat my friend, i knew him because of my dad, there are times when my dad had a practice and viktor was there to watch it, viktor always babysits me, and he's doing a great job at that. my dad is a professional quidditch player, sometimes i like to follow his practice with the team and all —but now, he's not around anymore because my mum killed him in front of me with a reason "he's distracting y/n too much from her future"

the durmstrangs sat on our —slytherins table. viktor takes a seat beside draco and i greet him and talking for a bit, but draco's very enthusiast to talk to the best seeker in the world, i might've been forgotten because of his fanboy soul began to show.

i heard viktor will put his name in the goblet, but still, i hope hogwarts wins.

suddenly, the ceiling turns into a dark shade of blue accompanied by howling wind and grumbles of lightning. rain pouring heavily. that's when we all realise someone's just entered the great hall. alastor moody, the auror. he waves his wand in the air to stop the rain and dumbledore immediately welcome him. then, moody drank something from his flask, that i'm sure of it's not a pumpkin juice or anything normal.

-

the next day, we got DADA for our first period. i took a seat beside draco.

professor moody teaches us about the unforgivable curses. i knew all of it and what its effects, seeing that i grow up with my mum who always uses it in front of me for some innocent muggles or sometimes for my dad. he always tried to change her but she didn't care about anything, about his husband, about me . but no matter what, my mum is my mum. she's cruel, heartless, strict, have no sympathy nor empathy —not even for her daughter. y/m/n eneco is who she is, no one could ever change her and that's one thing i love about her; she knows who she is.

"there are three unforgivable curses, and they're so named?" moody asks

"because they're unforgivable, using one of them will ..." granger answers shakily

"will earn one-way ticket to azkaban! correct!" cut moody, "so which curse shall we see first? hm... weasley!" moody points at weasley who looked scared "stand! give us a curse!"

"well, my dad did tell me about the one um... imperius curse?" ron answers hesitantly, his body shaking.

"correct!" moody walks toward his desk and open a jar of spider, and take it to his hands and mutter "imperio". moody made the spider walks around the tables and put it on weasley's hair, draco laughing uncontrollably. "what're you laughing at?!" moody glares to our table and put the spider on draco's face.

"ah! get off of me! get off of me!" draco whimpers, trying to get off the spider of his face, making me snort looking at his expression before moody decides to remove it from draco's face,

"talented isn't she? what shall i have her do next? jump out the window? drown herself?" moody puts the spider on his table. he starts talking about how death eaters using fake excuses as such imperio'd so that they don't have to reveal the real reason why they followed voldemort, and we just need to know which is the real one.

moody began to walk around to ask another curse. neville put his hand in the air hesitantly. "longbottom is it? come! come!" moody nods towards his desk and neville walk down to it, not sure if it's a right choice, "crucio!" the spider began writhing and screeching loudly from the pain.

i know that neville's parents being tortured by bellatrix lestrange, using cruciatus curse until they don't remember anything, not even their son. they have now been taken care of at st.mungo's, even though there's no progress as such. i feel sorry for them. i feel sorry for neville, but my mum always says to never feel sorry even if you're wrong especially that we are purebloods, i can't help but still feel sorry. probably, if my mum knows that i have 'feelings' i'd be her crucio dummy or maybe her personal sculpture that she always carved so that it stays that way. that's why i have a lot of scars on my body, particularly on my stomach. she loves writing words onto my skin, she says it looks beautiful, the pain is beautiful.

"stop it! stop it! can't you see it's bothering STOP IT!" granger shouts angrily but also sadly. moody raises his eyebrow and stops.

"can you name the last curse then, ms.granger?" moody walks towards her desk, she has tears in her eyes that began falling as he walks closer. she shakes her head.

"no? AVADA KEDAVRA!" the spider now is dead. "there's only one person survive this curse, and he's in this room!" he starts to walk to potter's desk and somehow manage to drink from his flask.

i've witnessed many muggles or witches or wizards being killed with the killing curse, i don't really feel anything, i almost feel numb because that much of people being killed in front of me. but deep down, i feel bad for them, i feel sorry for them. i just put all that feeling behind the façade of mine to accomplish the future my mum has already decide, and i wish i could be the one to control my life, not her. and i wish, i am brave enough to defy her. though, i feel somewhat protected by my mum, by her killing and torturing thirst —though i also scared of what might happen to me. bellatrix lestrange and my mum are partners or rather best friends, or even soulmate especially on torturing part.

but just to imagine seeing a curse that barely made him alive in front of his eyes; it hurts and i don't want to feel the same thing. that's why it's hard for me to defy my mum. i am a coward.