Nothing waits for you to live

Chapter 1.

It's been two years since I've moved in with my aunt. It's been two years since I've seen my dad. The move was a blur, and I can only faintly remember what happened. The only thing I can clearly remember is the argument I and my dad had previously. " Cas, when are you going to trust me when it comes to what's best for you?" " When will you understand that I don't want to live with my aunt!" I huffed. It's the middle of the night and all of a sudden your telling me that I'm going to have to move? Why couldn't you have said this before? Why didn't you DISCUSS with me? You act like I'm something you can throw away anytime it -. My head starts throbbing and I can hear my heart pounding in my ear. Searing pain pierces my stomach, gasping I double over and end up on the floor. A sharp ringing blares in my ear. " Cas? Are you ok? What's going on?!" I can feel my dad's hand on my back. Forcing my head between my legs. I gasp and inhale the stale air. " Breathe Cas. Ok... Cas focus on your breathing. Just breathe." The pain lessens and I'm able to focus on the dim light coming from my room. I struggle to get up and sit on the edge of my bed. " I'm fine. Just please leave me alone."
"Cas I'm sorry, I promise I will explain everything in good time. But for now, you need to go and live with your aunt. It isn't safe for you to be here right now. I know you have questions but please for time's sake just pack." I looked up and stared at my father. What I saw confused me. His expression was grim and his eyes seemed glassy. It seemed as if he aged several years. I've only seen my father like this once. And it was unsettling. I decided to give up and give my dad what he wanted. I took a deep breath. " Ok... I'll go live with my aunt Danielle. On the condition that you tell me everything when I come back home." My dad's expression seemed distant as he grabbed his neck and turned towards the window. " Sure. Kiddo." His voice was raw. I stared at my father, really looking at his face and image. He had straight black hair that sometimes curved up when he ran his hands through it multiple times. He had an almost caramel tint to his skin. He was only 35 but his eye bags and daunt expression made him seem much older.
His nose was crooked and he had dark brown eyes. That seemed to twinkle whenever he was happy. But tonight they seemed cloudy and unclear. I looked away and went to my closet to grab my suitcase. I heard my dad get up from my bed and his footsteps head towards the door. I saw him linger in the doorway and sigh. I turned my back to him and started gathering my clothes in the worn red suitcase. I continued to pack silently until I heard him walk away. I inhaled as much air as I could. Then I sighed deeply, I seriously couldn't believe that I had to leave everything behind. My friends, my school, my dad. Everything. It seemed incredible how life seemed to go great one day but change drastically as the next day came. I glanced at my door to make sure that my dad wasn't nearby. And I silently closed it. That was the last day I saw or heard from my dad.


BEEP, BEEP groaning I lifted my comforter and glanced at my alarm clock. It read 7:00 a.m covering my head again I sighed. A blast of music came on and I huffed. " Fine, Fine." I threw off the sheets and got up. Grabbing my phone off my desk I turned on the screen. Pressing my index finger on the sensor a picture of me and my best friend Amy appeared. Scrolling down to the messaging app I clicked on the latest one. CASSIE! Guess what happened? Replying I said dunno tell meh. Scooting on my bed I leaned over and grabbed the towel from my desk chair. Getting up I opened my dresser drawers in search of an outfit suitable for school. Debating over a skirt and leggings I pick leggings, a white tank top, and my black and red checkered flannel. Hugging my things to my chest I open my room door and walk to the bathroom. The cool tiles pleasing my sweaty feet. As soon as I was inside, I locked the door and starting stripping. Stepping in the tub I hesitantly turned the water on and almost shrieked when the water was freezing cold. Jumping back so the water didn't reach me I waited a couple of minutes until I stuck my hand out to feel the temperature. The water was lukewarm and I got back in, water droplets beating against my body. For a moment I let the warmth envelop me. Closing my eyes I was standing on a sandy beach threading my fingers through the crystal clear water. I was happy, at peace. The sun was blazing and as I turned my head towards it there was a high-pitched ringing in my ear. Startled I gasped and inhaled water, choking I coughed repeatedly. My chest hurt and I sighed. Grabbing my soap and shampoo I rubbed until I was red and no longer had any soap on me whatsoever. Grabbing my towel to dry off I put on my underwear and bra, standing on one foot I put my foot through the legging hole and fought the clingy material to get them on. Finally, having all my clothes on I scooped my dirty laundry and threw them in the hamper. Brushing my teeth and combing my thick dark brown hair I stared at the reflection in the mirror. My dark brown eyes staring back as I lifted my hair from my forehead and saw a fading scar, a piece of the girl I used to be. Shaking my head I put my things away and walked back to my room. Hearing out for any noise I was met with stilled silence. Shrugging I opened my room door and closed it silently behind me. Looking around, my bed was sending serious nap rays and I itched to lay down. Glancing at my clock it was already 7:40 blowing air out through my nose I sat at my desk. I had begged my aunt to buy it when I first saw it at a thrift store. Its brown oak top felt so smooth and had a carving on it. By the drawer top, it said C & N but instead of & there was an infinity sign and it always felt weirdly strange as I traced the letters with the tip of my fingers. " I want it that way, tell me why!" I groaned as the backstreet boys played on my phone. It was Amy's ringtone because she loved Aj Mclean. Me, not really I only liked this song and that was because it was basically an anthem. I opened my phone and saw ten messages from her. Laughing I opened the first one. Micheal asked me out!!! I inwardly groaned Micheal was the guy she's been obsessed over since 8th grade. Scrolling down the other series of texts was heart emoji, shocked emoji, sherlock emoji, and kissing emoji. Shaking my head I reached to my dresser and pulled out a pair of socks. Putting them on I scanned the room for my wireless earbuds. Finding them on top of my side table I grabbed them and stood up to get my book bag and lanyard. Putting both my backpack and lanyard on I slipped my phone into my flannel pocket. Opening the room door I strained my neck to see if my aunt was awake yet. Hearing a faint snore I crept silently to the front door and closed it silently behind me. Glancing up at the sky the clouds covered any light coming from the sun and I shivered. I put my earbuds in and pulled my phone out from my pocket clicking on Spotify I pressed mellow and hit play. " I asked my therapist, my mom and dad, the same. I asked my friends and fam they all say I'm to blame. I'm tired of pretending I'm ok, Cause I'm not ok. Today might be the day I go to Insane." I bobbed my head up and down and walked to Shaker High. 25 minutes later I began to see the familiar steps of my prison for the next 7 hours. Climbing them I slipped my hand in my pocket and turned on my phone looking at the main screen 8: 15. Puffing my cheeks out I started jogging but halted abruptly. I stopped running and decided to milk my time until the second period. Opening the door I made a beeline for the cafeteria and paused in the doorway the fluorescent lights blinding. After a couple of seconds to recuperate, I could see again and I made my way towards the breakfast line. Grabbing a giant chocolate muffin I glanced around the cafe. It was mainly empty except for a guy sitting at the end of a table with his head in his hands. Since his face wasn't visible all I could see was a mass of dark and light brown hair that looked like he ran his fingers through it often. He was wearing a white fitted tee, skinny jeans, and black and white checkered vans. Shrugging I took my muffin and walked to the end of the table and sat down. Breaking huge chunks off the top I ate it eagerly. I closed my eyes and imagined I was in a meadow with a lavender scent swirling in the air. Hearing a jingle and opened my eyes. I grabbed my phone and looked at my notifications, it was from Snapchat. Opening the app I scrolled to the latest post. Tapping the little circle I coughed almost choking. It was a picture of Amy and Cameron, my eighth-grade boyfriend kissing passionately, and Cam's shirt was off. What the?She texted me earlier that she was dating Micheal. How the hell did this happen? Especially with Cam. MY Cam. Inhaling sharply I felt queasy. I closed my eyes and placed my forehead against the cool table until I saw red splotches on my eyelids. The bell rang, short and sweet. My eyes widened and I brushed my hand against them. Grabbing the leftover muffin I got up and threw it away. I started walking towards the hallway and passed the same guy who was still and unmoving. I paused unsure whether to tell him the bell rang or go my way. Taking a deep breath I walked over to his table and leaned over, patting the top of his head. It was surprisingly soft and I itched to do it again. "Hey, the bell just rang." He moved his head slightly his eyelids half-opened. He smiled slow and easy. " Good morning sunshine." He looked tired, rumpled, and beautiful. Ignoring his remark I gestured towards the hallway " Just wanted to wake you before you were late." He tilted his head " Have you ever had that dream where you were flying?"
Closing my eyes for a split second I replied: " No, but it sounds amazing I always loved the feeling of wind beating against my face." Adding silently " I think it would also be scary, loving that feeling so much but having the possibility of it being taken away." Looking back at him his eyes were wide. The intensity of his brown and golden speckled eyes was overwhelming. He looked at me like he was searching for something, what I didn't know. With a swift nod, he pushed himself from the table and got up. Hitching his backpack upon his shoulders he started walking towards the hall. Watching him leave was weird so I started walking. He abruptly stopped and turned, a half-smile playing on his lips. " My name is Henry by the way." He started jogging and turned a corner, vanishing from sight. My name still on the tip of my tongue I shook my head and ran for my second period almost forgetting for a moment the picture of Amy and Cam. Getting to my desk just as the bell rang I instinctively turned towards the window. It was still cloudy and it looked like it was going to start pouring soon. Taking a deep breath I glanced around, searching for Amy. Her usual spot was next to me but today she wasn't in sight. With a sigh of relief, I continued looking out of the window until I heard my teacher's voice. " Cassie, would you like to add anything?" I bit my tongue " Nein nicht Wirklich." A couple of people snickered and my eyes silently pleaded with Ms. Bernstein. She sighed and went back to the front of the class. " How do you say daydream in german class?" " Tagtraum" we chorused. " So what is it we shouldn't be?" she made a point not to look at me. " Ein Tagträumer und ein Misserfolg im Leben?" snickered a narrowed face blondie. Approvingly Ms. Bernstein nodded " Good." and went back to her lesson. I felt sick and rubbed my eyes. "Hey, Don't mind Ms. Bern, she can be really nervig in the morning." Turning I saw Peter a redhead with weirdly pale skin. "Yeah I know," I whispered. His eyes flashed with concern " Are you ok?" Unsure whether he saw the picture or not I shrugged. " Are we really ever?" " Fair point," he said and turned back towards the board. Sighing I pushed forward hoping the day would end sooner. In Geometry, I half dozed as Mr.K talked about triangles and their angles. I glanced at the clock on the wall and saw there were only five more minutes of this school. Closing my eyes, my mind went back to the thought of my best friend with my ex. It bothered me not because she was with him, but because she didn't have the decency to tell me. Everyone was giving me weird looks and muttering beneath their breath. I tried to ignore it but shit takes a toll on you.The class was dismissed and hitching my backpack on my shoulder I started making my way to my locker when someone bumped into me roughly. " Hey watch it," I snapped. Looking up I only saw a blond head bobble down the hall and out of sight. Exhaling I turned towards my locker and spun the dial by memory. Seconds later the old blue door opened and a neatly folded note sat at the bottom. Recognizing the handwriting instantly I shoved the note in my flannel and slammed my locker door closed. I wasn't going to give them the satisfaction of me opening it. Walking towards the double doors that led outside I inhaled and pushed with a huge amount of force. My heart was pounding as I ran through the rain. The water beating down hard and fast. I was about 15 minutes away from home when the sole of my foot slipped. I heard a squeak and then felt myself lose balance. It happened so quickly I forgot to reach out for something before I fell. Landing on my ass I yelled " Shit!" I closed my eyes, I was so done with today. Hearing a cough I opened my eyes. Looking up I saw a familiar head of brown hair. Startled I quickly got up and faced him. " You look like a wet mop," he grinned. Extending his hand, the rain no longer hit me. Glancing up I saw that he had a huge black umbrella, he probably read the forecast like any normal person. Shaking my head, I sprayed him with water droplets and he laughed as they hit him. " How far do you live?" I asked questioningly. " Not far about 15 minutes." I squinted my eyes he couldn't live that close without me knowing I mean, I practically live outside. As if agreeing the wind blew harder bringing the rain down at alarming speed. Walking slowly I continued to shiver, my teeth chattering. " You alright? You look like your freezing." Clenching my teeth I nodded. He stopped and took off his book bag, opening the zipper he dug his hand in until he got what he needed. Yanking a black hoodie out he closed his backpack and looked at me expectantly. " I am going to need this back, this is my favorite hoodie." Nodding without really thinking I took it and put it on, immediate warmth surrounding me. Sighing with relief I looked at him " Why didn't you wear it?" " I'm hot, plus it's not really cold" Scoffing I hugged my arms, feeling better I grew curious. " So Henry, what kept you awake so late at night you had to sleep at school?" He tilted his head in thought," Depends." I arched a brow " On what?" His eyes glanced at me once again lost in thought" If you want to come and see..." Not sure how to answer I replied "Depends." " On what?" he repeated. " If it's worth my time." Shrugging he said, "Guess you have to come to find out." Nodding I said " Guess I do. What are the three W's?" I half expected him to not know what I meant but he answered without skipping a beat. " 2:00 a.m, the park. " My eyes widened, he stayed awake till 2? He chuckled at my expression and I narrowed my eyes. Yeah right he probably slept and woke up, either way, I accepted his challenge. " Ok see you there." Looking away I noticed we were closer to my house than I had expected. It was only a couple of houses down, turning back to him I said " My house is down there, you?" He scanned the houses "It's about 5 min away, it's the last house on the street." Nodding I pulled the hood on preparing myself to run. As soon as we got to the front of my house I stopped. He glanced at me " You can keep the hoodie until tomorrow ok?" Relieved that I could keep it longer I nodded even though I wished I could keep it. I mean it was broken in and extremely comfortable. "It's here..." I gestured towards the modern home. " See you later?" " I'll be there," he said eyes twinkling. I started jogging towards my home throwing open the front door I slammed it closed. Leaning against it I couldn't keep my mind from screaming that something was wrong. I walked to my room and left the door open. Sitting on my bed I kicked off my shoes and peeled off my socks. I grabbed my phone from my pocket and opened it. No new messages groaning my heart started beating faster. I laid my head on my pillow and sighed. The glow in the dark stickers glowed dimly against the black paint on the ceiling. Something hurt, it felt like my body hummed with pain. Grinding my teeth I clutched the hoodie material in my hands and gasped. My eyes were open but I couldn't see anything, the world went black. And for I while I was lost in the oblivion. Trying not to panic I stilled my breath straining my ears I could hear a faint hum, it sounded distant, faraway. Yet it sounded so familiar, almost as if I had heard it before. Searing pain in my stomach pounced and I could see a blinding light for split second. Gasping I sat up and wiped my eyes with the back of my hand. My vision returned and I stared at the wall. What the hell was that?! I searched my memory trying to recall where I had heard that voice before but came back empty. My heart continued to pound in my ears and I felt as if my room began to shrink. Throwing my hair in a ponytail I got up and grabbed my socks pulling them on quickly. Standing up I ran to the mat where I placed my shoes and I grabbed my rain boots. Without thinking I grabbed my Landyard and ran from my room. Opening the backdoor I absently checked to make sure it was locked and slammed it closed. The wind-cold, and sharp slapped me in the face. I took a deep breath hoping it would steady my beating heart. To no avail, my legs seemed to carry me towards the woods.