you just can't be replaced | unfinished + unedited

i need you jake

(trigger warning!!! this chapter is amy telling jake what happened to her with teddy)

*amys pov*

jake and i start walking on the sidewalk leaving the office, i feel myself trembling, im really gonna tell him, im finally gonna tell someone, i can get help, but what if it back fires, what if teddy finds out, what if jake reacts poorly, i start to spiral more and more. stopping myself from spiralling any further i turn towards jake. "look jake, what im about to say is really hard for me to let out, and could potentially end really badly, and im scared you'll see me differently, im scared you'll react poorly or freak out, you're the only one that ive even come close to telling but i can trust you, especially after what you said at the expo and how you help me calm down" i say taking a deep breath. "amy, i promise you can tell me anything, nothing will change the way i see you, and i promise ill try and react in a way that reassures you and keeps you safe" he says, still walking i let out a slight smile, he does reassure me, the things he says makes me feel safe and makes me feel like i can tell my story. something about jake just soothes me. "well you know those days i took off cause i was sick..." i take another deep breath as he nods. "i, i wasn't sick" i say then look down while we walk and he looks at me slightly confused "what do you mean, if you weren't sick, what was wrong?"

i can do this, im okay, this is okay, i can do it.

"i, well, its just-" i stop for a second and jake places his hand on my shoulder and we stop walking, i know he can tell what im about to say isn't good. "teddy...raped me, we went to dinner and it was really bad, he kept insulting me and then he forced me to come over and he pushed me down against-" i get cut off by jake hugging me softly yet tightly. he rubs my back and pulls away a few seconds later and looks at me softly. "amy, i am so sorry, im so sorry you had to go through that, im sorry that this happened, he's a jerk, worst than a jerk, he's-" i cut him off because i can tell he's getting angrier and angrier. "jake, the reason i told you is because i trust you, because i know that you can help me and together we can make this right, get justice or something, im... not entirely sure, i told you because you're the only sense of security ive been about to feel recently and without you im not sure where id be, i need you jake, i need help" he gives me another hug and hugs me for a while, feeling his touch, his warmth, his sincereness feels nice, it feels as if this is where im meant to be. after a few moments he looks back at me with his eyes slightly watery.

*jakes pov*

i want to kill him, i want him to pay for what he did, i can feel the anger rushing through me while she struggles to tell me what happen, but i know anger like that isn't the way to go, i know that that's what she meant by react poorly but man if i had the chance id destroy him. i decide to give her a hug and i stay there for a while, i tell her im sorry and i can feel the anger rushing back to me, luckily she cuts me off in time so i don't spiral . she looks at me

"jake, the reason i told you is because i trust you, because i know that you can help me and together we can make this right, get justice or something, im... not entirely sure, i told you because you're the only sense of security ive been about to feel recently and without you im not sure where id be, i need you jake, i need help"

im paying attention to each and every single word she tells me. if im honest im a little shocked, shocked that she trusts me this much, well dont get me wrong im so grateful but its scary, im scared for her, i hug her again, this time for longer, this time i let myself be in her arms and suddenly i feel tears rushing down my cheeks. "im so sorry amy, i promise ill do whatever it takes to help, i promise ill never leave your side and ill be here every single step of the way" i say placing my hand on her shoulder, she gives me a slight smile while her eyes also begin to water.

"do you want to tell anyone else? rosa? captain?" i ask looking at her softly implying that this is totally her decision and that i will support her no matter what. she sighs lightly while she thinks, "i think i should, but only them, no one else, im scared jake, im scared about what this will do, what this will do to my career, my reputation, my friends, im so scared" tears now rushing through her cheeks, i hug her again, feeling her body shake, feeling her fear and sadness. "please dont let me do this alone, because i dont think ill be able to do it if you're not by my side" she says softly while sniffling, still hugging her i promise her that ill stand by her side no matter what and ill never let her go through this alone. she pulls out of the hug still shaking like crazy "come on amy. lets get you a coffee and get you out of the cold" she nods and wipes her eyes carefully not removing any of the makeup she has on. i put two and two together of that being being the reason she'd been wearing that much makeup, to cover bruises and/or scratches.

"do you want to tell them today? ill be right by your side" i say reassuring her. she nods "i think its for the best if we do, or else i know i never will. i cant let him win but im so scared" she says slowly turning around to walk back towards the office. i place my arm around her shoulder and start walking along side of her. "thats why ill never let you go, ill never let you be alone and ill be here every step of the way ames"

ames

i think i just found my new nickname for her, ames, my soft, beautiful, strong ames. the ames im in love with, ill never let her go through this alone, never.

-jj