Chapter 29: It Wasn't Fair

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I'm numb as I walk into the room. Juvia is shaking. Grey is still as a statue. Juvia is the only one that has seen Lucy, she knows what to expect, but I don't think that's of any help.

"She looks like she's sleeping." Grey's voice is so low I can barely hear it. I inch toward Lucy's side and I look down at her.

"She knew." I say, "she's known since she was ten." My voice is rough,

"I can't." Juvia ducks out of the room. Grey hesitates. "you need some time with her." He says before following Juvia out.

I stand there beside Lucy, watching her. Her eyes are closed and her hair is messy. It could almost be any other night, accept that her chest is still. She's not muttering nonsense or proclaiming discoveries. I don't want to feel like this. I don't want to feel nothing when Lucy makes me feel so much

"Hey, Mrs. Dragneel." My words are stiff, stiff like she was while her brain bled when I held her in my lap trying to order an Uber.

There is no 'hey Mr. Dragneel' back. I brush her hair aside then I tuck it behind her ear, she always has her hair all around her face.

"is your headache gone?" I lean against the bed and it's getting hot.

"It wasn't fair, you know." I can't help the anger filling the nothing "it wasn't fair for you not to tell me. To keep a secret like this." I think of how I love how she's a bad liar, looking back she really is. She never lied, she'd just tell me in different ways. The way she appreciates everything.

"I would've spent more time with you, I would've... I wouldn't have wasted time trying to convince you to stay in bed. I would've done more with you.

"I would've taken you to Paris and...and the Maldives and to all the places you wanted to go." I grab her hand and I hold it, I kiss it. I love the way her hand feels around mine. I press her hand to my forehead and I feel tears slide down my cheeks and drop onto her arm. I push her hair back again. I love her hair.

"I would've worked harder to give you everything." My hand is tangled in her dark hair. I love the color of her hair. I lean over her and kiss her forehead, her nose, her cheeks, her chin and finally her lips. They're soft and warm and still taste like her fruity lip balm. I love her lips. I pull back and I look at her face, the tiny freckles on her nose and cheeks. The almond shape of her eyes. There's a fake lash hanging off her real lashes and I peel it away and throw it onto the ground. I love her eyelashes. I cradle her face in my hands and trail my thumb under her eye. "I love you, Lucy." I tell her "I love you." I say again and drop my head onto her chest. There is no rise and fall of her chest. There is no steady heartbeat to lull me to sleep.

"Excuse me." One of the nurses walks in "Your wife is an organ donor." She sounds sad.

"There is a young girl about two floors above us who is a match to your wife." The nurse says. "The retrieval team is here.

"Right now?" I ask, not opening my eyes.

"Yes, sir." The nurse says. I squeeze Lucy's hand and I kiss her but I can't move.

"She's still sleeping." I say, "I'll let you know when she wakes up."

"Sir..." the nurse trails off and the door closes and it's just us and time is frozen.

One hundred three hours and twenty-eight minutes. That is how long my life was more than I could have ever dreamed .

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Dear Natsu

This is my vow to you

I didn't know that I knew I was going to love you. We met by chance and you were so cheesy and cute and just you and it was the most honest and endearing thing I had ever seen. So, I said yes to our first date.

I didn't know it then, but that was when I said our first I do.

I couldn't have guessed that before we went on our first date and we danced and you called me the day before and you asked me what color I was wearing, and you showed up in the same color pocket square and tie and a beautiful corsa­­­­ge. I couldn't have guessed that that was the second time I said I do.

No one told me, that falling in love, into, honest, unconditional true love happens like making a friend in the sandbox as a toddler. You start to play together, then you share toys and then your mom takes you home but... you think about your new friend until the next time you see them.

I didn't know what true love felt like, until I met you, and I made a friend. I didn't know that you say I do hundreds of times before you're even asked.

I will say I do everyday I have with you, Natsu. I will hold your hand through the highs and the lows, I will feed you chicken noodle soup from a can when you are sick and I will love you with every beat of my heart and every breath in my body... until death tears us apart. And even then, I will wait for you again and we can have more I do's.

I want so many more I do's with you than the ones we've had. Than the ones we'll get because even if I live out my entire life with this thing in my brain, it still won't be enough. Still, I'll treasure each one that we do get.

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Author's Note:

Thank you so much for tagging along with me, i was so excited to share this with everyone and I'm really excited to have this published as a real book.

Natsu's name is Theo

Lucy' - Lana

Juvia Shaina

Grey Alex

the story doesn't change much but webnovel also reached out to me and due to their fomratting requirments i'll be adding additional scenes likely flash backs for that version of it.

it comes out on february 3rd 2021

and just a excited side note one of my favorite authors MArlene Perez liked my ig Reel about my book and i about died. she also followed me on ig and i'm dying of happiness.

i have a goal of 100 reviews on this story within the first two weeks. if anyone here would like a free e copy of this final book i would be more than happy to send one your way.

i want to do a giveaway shortly after release and that will be on my ig @ nunchigoya

i cannot thank everyone who has left kinds words for me on my story and has stuck with me.

i will be posting the final chapter on February 3rd for the compeletion so post schedule will be every other day while i finish up edits and promotion for the book.

again i can't thank you enough

XOXO

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