broken by the sea shore

behind closed doors part one

AUTHORS NOTE 

mentions of  P.T.S.D ,abuse, panic attacks and underage drinking  (let me know if i missed anything)in saying so i just wanted to say i  DO  NOT endorse any of the characters actions .i am aware none of my I's are capitalized  and there are A LOT of spelling  errors and run on sentences.  i hate editing. this is my first book so be nice and please keep  in mind this book was made  for ages  10 and up due to some violent scenes  so please keep the comments curse/r rated content free(my parents read this) also i do not update regularly so if you cant deal with suspense  dont read this .i own none of the rights to  these characters except jaxie mayback who is entirely made from my imagination.  setting and characters belong to the creators of outer banks and no the dog dosent die.i mention this cause i  wont read something if the dog dies and  i know im not alone,oh and just pre tend  for the sake of the story that the maybacks live by the beach. also italics = talking or important info and kia = kie and what is wheezes (Sarah camarons sister)Real name 

intro  this is a jj outer banks fan fic where we see how jjs life is behind closed doors  told from jjs 16 year old sister  jaxie jax mayback

It's night time and I can hear my dad snoring on the couch inside passed out drunk after a long night. outside on the porch I pull my blanket around my bruised arms  as i grimace in pain the hammock swaying as i reposition myself jj mayback, my older brother sleeps peacefully on the other side of the hammock he looks so peaceful when he's asleep totally different to his stressed face he wears when hes awake i stand up since everyone is sleeping and i still have a few hours before the sun goes up i grab some paper inside the house taking extra care not to make a noise i write a note for jj he's very protective so he would worry so much if i left without telling him you'll see why later i grab my longboard out of the sand and head down the rocks to the beach.

Running down the rocks i scratch my foot on a rock bleeding i will worry about it later when i'm surfing i can be myself let all my worries drain out let my raw broken unfiltered self shine through let all my emotions just come flying out you see surfing is my escape i catch some monster waves spending hours in the sun the wind blowing thru my hair my hands grasping the water executing a tight 360 turn  i even ride one into the shore

but when i get there i see jj holding his face and when he moves his hands i see the bruises that run up and down his face one of which was bleeding oh jj what happened to you jj responds with a hushed tone dads awake i grimace i don't have school till 9 and it's 8 i muster up some courage and tell j you should just go to john b's house i was scared but i know my dad was tougher on jj than me so the best thing to do is just remove jj till dad falls asleep as much as it pains me to let him go i slowly let go of his arm and head back up the beach your crazy if you think i would leave you here with that sociopath he grabs my arm lightly i still flinch in pain he grabbed where one of my bruises were on accident i'm so sorry jaxie i didn't mean to i still can't believe he did that to you i'm gonna kill him anger rushes into his face it's okay jj they dont even hurt that much anymore i say running my hand softly down my arm knowing he can tell i'm lying over the years i've gotten really good at lying and make up excuses for why i have so many bruises but he could always tell when i was lying pleading with my eyes it would just be harder if he resisted i hear a loud bang from inside the house oh no dads mad i flinch at the noise glad no one was around to hear i'm gonna kill him jj says i hate him.it's okay jj im used to it i say with a soft smile jj frowns i can tell he feels bad for me ugh i hate pity just go john b needs you j ill be fine we do this everyday just go.it's just a hour then i will go to school i say i don't know why you don't just skip we could go surfing i know you weren't nearly done he is right i usually spend hours surfing but i skipped yesterday dad wouldn't let me go so i have to go today jj you know my teachers are already suspicious plus i have a test today i know i still haven't convinced him jj please you know if i need you i will just call you i hold up my phone that i left in the sand s.o.s remember to explain ever since we were little we would text each other if we needed help he would never text me till after it happened cause he wouldn't want me to get hurt or to see him get hurt so i tried to do the same but sometimes i would call him during so he could take me away on his bike j you gotta go dads gonna be mad im not there please just go to john b's house please i beg i see jj thinking about it.just go i say you promise you'll call me if you need help jaxie yes i smile okay okay i promise i run over and hug jj he takes out his phone and calls the pogues bye j i wait till he jumps in the van to walk up the beach to the house kia from the driver's seat waves at me i wave back.