I'm Not The Only One (Scomiche)

7: Weekend

“Pack up and leave everything.”

Leave Your Lover by Sam Smith

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The next few weeks were nothing but torture. I never told Scott about my talk with Alex. It would have been easier if he knew that Alex knew, but what I wanted was for us to be together because he chose me and not because felt like he had no other option.

I kept my mouth shut and waited. It was driving me crazy knowing Alex was doing everything in his power to keep his relationship with Scott. I don’t know what he told Scott but Scott hasn’t said anything to me, so I assumed that Alex didn’t tell Scott about our conversation either.

Scott rarely went home, and I didn’t bother asking why. I already knew the answer every single time. He’d tell me he’ll be out late, to not to wait for him, or that he wasn’t going home that night. He cancelled on several of our plans, always saying that something came up. For some reason it felt like I was the one being cheated on and it made me feel horrible. But I knew I wasn’t in the position to demand or to complain, so I didn’t.

A couple of times I was tempted to tell Scott to stop being stupid and to stop believing that everything was right between him and Alex. I wanted to tell him that Alex already knew, and that his boyfriend was only manipulating him into spending time with him. But it always came down to the fact that I was still holding on to Scott’s promise - that it was only a matter of time, and that he will choose me. What I said to Alex was also true - that I’ve never forced Scott into choosing, and I sure as hell wasn’t going to do it now. I had a little pride, albeit misguided and out of place, but pride nonetheless. I didn’t want to beg any more than I was already doing.

But then Alex really tested my limits.

It was the third time that Scott said he would be out all weekend with Alex. It was a Friday night and he was packing his bags for his 2-day out of town trip.

I was seated on the edge of the bed, watching him put clothes into his duffel bag. He was going back and forth between the closet and bed, silently murmuring his checklist to himself.

“Where are you going this time?” I asked.

He stopped pacing and looked at me. “I’m not sure. He said it was a surprise.”

Ask him. Just… ask him. “Can’t you stay? You’ve been out the past two weekends. Say something came up or whatever. You’ve barely been home and…” I took a deep breath. “I miss you.”

Scott’s face softened. He put down what he was holding and sat beside me. “Baby… I…”

He’s going to say no. Again. You’ll be left alone. Again. Just fucking tell him. No, wait. Don’t. God, Mitch, get yourself together.

“I’ll be home Sunday night. That isn’t too far,” he tried to console me.

Home. I’m home. He’s coming home… to me. The thought made me smile a little. “Don’t have too much fun, then.”

He chuckled lightly. “You know I’ll be thinking about you, right? And of course I’ll miss you.”

Ha. Take that, Alex.

Scott hugged me by the waist. I tilted my chin up and expected the soft kiss that came next.

“I need to finish packing soon and then go to sleep. My day tomorrow will start early. Good night, baby.”

I stopped myself from frowning. “Good night.” I went back to my room and got on my laptop to distract myself. I decided to work on a few articles until I was so drained and tired that I didn’t have time to think anymore.

When I woke up the following day, Scott was already gone. I expected him to be, but a wave of sadness, longing and jealousy still surged through me. It was too early in the day for me to feel horrible so I took a shower and put on my favorite top. I grabbed my laptop and headed to Starbucks where I spent at least 4 hours, just drinking coffee and writing. It was after lunch when I decided to move my ass. I was not in the mood to go home and be reminded that I was alone and that Scott was doing lucifer-knows-what with his fucking boyfriend. I went to the nearest mall and did some retail therapy and bought a lot of things which I didn’t really need.  

As soon as I arrived home I started preparing again. I was having dinner and drinks with the girls. I didn’t want to, honestly, because I’ve been scolded over and over since they found out about my talk with Alex. But I didn’t want to stay home either, and my creative juices for writing were all squeezed out.

“Look who decided to show up,” said Lia as soon as I sat down on the table. We were in a Japanese restaurant and were doing sushi night, as per her request.

“We were taking bets on whether you’ll come tonight,” Caty added.

“You’ve been avoiding us.” It was statement rather than a question coming from Brookes.

“Good evening, ladies. I’m fine, thanks for asking.” I sat down and smiled widely at each one of them.

“Why are you happy?” Lia asked with one eyebrow raised.

“Can’t I be happy?” I widened my eyes at her.

“Uh, no,” she replied flatly.

“Wow, thanks and fuck you.” I glared at her.

“Fuck you, too, and you’re welcome,” she said with a smirk.

“Can we order?” I changed the topic.

“I’m actually very hungry,” Caty said.

“So let’s get stuffed, yes?” Brookes looked around the table. We all nodded in reply.

The rest of dinner was fun. The sarcastic remarks and jokes kept coming but I was so used to it that I was able to laugh it off.

We transferred to a nearby bar afterwards and literally danced and drank the night away. It was a good way to forget, at least temporarily, and not dwell on all of my heartaches and troubles. The cute guys who sent drinks to our table were just an added bonus.

I wasn’t sober enough to drive home so I stayed over at Caty’s after. Actually, we all did. Thank heavens for her sofa bed which Lia and I shared, while she and Brookes took the bed.

We were all hungover and cranky the following morning, but it wasn’t anything ibuprofen, coffee and pancakes couldn’t fix. I was feeling more human by the time lunch rolled around. I said my goodbyes and thanked the girls for keeping me company that weekend.

The first thing I noticed when I pulled into the driveway was that Scott’s car was there. I hurriedly went inside and saw him curled up on the couch, a blanket wrapped around his shoulders while watching TV. He turned it off when he realized I was there.

“Why are you home?” I asked, puzzled. “I thought you’d be back later tonight.”

“Didn’t you get my messages?”

Crap. My phone. “Sorry, ran out of battery and kind of forgot about it. I was out with the girls and we all stayed over at Caty’s after.” I walked to the couch and sat beside him. “What happened?”

Scott took a deep breath. “Alex and I broke up.”