After getting diagnosed with a rare, terminal illness and being forced right out of his perfectly normal life, Jeon Jeongguk lost all his faith in living. Just six more months and he'll be dead. Gone. Forgotten. However, when a new hospital friendsh...
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"You didn't go to the group, did you?"
It was dinner time, and Jeongguk wasn't expecting to be interrogated first thing when he joined Sae at the dinner table. He thought he could really get past the whole "I skipped the group" thing without any mention of it because he was quite the self-certified sneaky bastard, but judging by the disappointment on Sae's face, this wasn't a joking matter.
"Why does it matter so much to you?" Jeongguk said, scooting forward in his chair, not daring to meet Sae's narrowed gaze unless he wanted to feel more guilty than he already was.
"Because you promised you'd try," Sae said flatly, pressing her lips into a firm line.
"And I did? Why don't you believe me" Jeongguk asked incredulously, helping himself to the vegetarian pizza Sae made on the table.
"Jeongguk, this is the one thing I'm asking you to do," Sae said, her tone oddly similar to the doctor voice she used whenever she tried to detach herself from his medical situation.
"And?" Jeongguk inhaled slowly, dropping his piece on his plate before leaning back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest and staring right back at her.
"I don't want to do it, it's pointless."
"You haven't even tried!" Her voice broke a little.
"And so? I've never tried a single fucking time in my life, Sae, and I'm doing spectacular," Jeongguk shot back, watching her bite down on her lip.
"Jeongguk, this is different," She tried, but he shook his head, forcing out a bitter laugh.
"How? It's putting effort into something that'd go to waste in the end. It's like college. Why would I make a friend if I can't stay with them until the end?"
"Jeongguk, it doesn't have to be that way." Oh but it was. It unfortunately was, and she knew that.
"It would be unfair to them," He deadpanned. "I don't think it's fair to make friends with people with their own shit hurt more with useless friendships."
"Getting a disease is different from making friends. Jeongguk, it's not so bad—,"
"—I know that," He cried out, "But Sae, I don't want friends. I don't want people to watch me die and feel sorry for me." He reached for the pizza and took an angry chomp from it.
"I already have you doing that," He said while chewing, "and you know, it fucking sucks."
"I'll be honest with you there. It fucking sucks."
A little too late, Jeongguk realized how heavy his words must have hit because she said absolutely nothing. Instead, she kinda deflated. But right as he swallowed to apologize, the scowl he wore softened as he watched Sae take off her glasses and set them on the table. Well, shit.
