Falling for a Bridgerton : a Bridgerton fanfic

chapter 12 : let me go

Let me go. Let me go. You have to let me go.

Anthony was suddenly woken up by a knock on the door.

He had been dreaming again.

He stretched his arms and mouthed a yawn as he glanced at his pocket watch.

It was a quarter past and he had fallen asleep waiting for her.

The rain was falling hard outside, and he could hear the echoes as it pattered across the windows.

He closed his eyes for a second and listened to the rain.

Let me go. Let me go. You have to let me go.

He opened his eyes again, silently cursing himself for thinking about her. 

Since the night of the Hastings Ball, those words continued to haunt Anthony, and he wasn't able to shake them away.

There hadn't been a week since that night where he didn't have the dream, and there hadn't been a day since when he didn't think about her.

Siena

He thought about her all the time, constantly.

And he absolutely hated himself for it.

The more he tried to forget about their relationship, the more the opposite occurred.

Anthony truly wanted to move on, but every fragment in his body essentially refused to let it happen.

In the morning, as he read the newspaper in the drawing-room, he unwittingly found himself looking for her name to see if it was listed in the columns.

When he went on walks, he frequently found himself inadvertently ending up across the modiste, hoping to catch sight of her.

The situation was hopeless, and Anthony was helpless.

What I know is that you are lost

Anthony shook his head, trying to rid himself of the memory.

He hated that Siena dared to tell him that he was lost, he hated it even more because he knew deep down that she was right.

He was lost.

Every time he thought he had it all figured out, it all would come crumbling down.

He had to look no further than Siena. She was a perfect example of that.

And now, that's how Anthony began to see her and their relationship: a lesson.

A lesson to never give his heart away, for how can something be broken if it was never whole in the first place.

He opened the front door and was greeted by the source as well as the solution to all of his recent troubles.

It was the girl.

The one who fondly liked to call him Badgerton.

She was carrying an umbrella over her head, her hair and cheeks dripping with raindrops.

Anthony eyed her up and down. She certainly looked better than the day he first met her, but she still appeared slightly disheveled as she stood on his front porch.

"Is everything okay?" she inquired, seeing the strange look on Anthony's face.

"Yeah, just come in," he grumbled, shutting the door before peering outside to see if anyone saw her enter.

After Siena left town, Anthony sold his old apartment and bought a new one on the other side of town.

It was one of many things he did to purge himself of anything that reminded him of her.