Three Little Words

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Silver likes saying I love you.

He knows he is guilty of this fact himself, perhaps overtly so, though he also knows he doesn't mind at all. He whispers it to Espio when they wake up in each other's arms, grateful both of them have gotten through the night safely despite the lack of any foreseeable danger. He murmurs it into Espio's mouth when they kiss, their lips either warm and gentle or strong and fierce as they hold the other tightly in their grasp and let passion flow between them. He wheezes it out when exhausted after their training, moments after he has collapsed right into the chameleon's chest and buried his face into the other's sturdy shoulder. He purrs it at night before they go to bed, or when they are taking a break in the ventilated office of the Chaotix Detective Agency and Vector's grin broadens as Charmy begins giggling at their antics. When walking around under a shining sun or glittering stars is always a good moment too, as is when the head detective is putting the little bee to bed and they have a bit of quiet time for themselves downstairs, or during any moment really wherein he feels he could probably insert an exclamation of love to make their day just a bit brighter. Yes, Silver likes saying I love you, ever since he learned the meaning of the word and the phrase. Both taste sweet on his tongue and feel warm in his chest, the mere thought of saying them to his beloved enough to bring a smile to his face. Other words do too: wonder, faith, peace, compassion, justice. Hope resonates with him extra strongly, igniting a passion within that makes him believe anything is possible. They have a history, he and hope.

There is a difference between hope and hoping, he has found: while hope itself is the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel, the certainty that everything will turn out okay, the love for life accumulated in and spread by every being in the very world around him, hoping always has that edge of desperation, the tiny voice in the back of his head that tells him things might go wrong somehow, and that all he has done will end in failure. It is not a difference he can actually explain, try as he might to Espio's sympathetic listening ears. Perhaps it resulted from his youth, wherein hope and hoping where the only two things he could reliably count on as he fought to survive in the ruined future of the world he loves so. Luckily for him at least one thing in his life has gone right, the tangible result of that almost always present at his side and ready to scold him for sneaking snacks out of their kitchen or recklessly jumping down the stairs. I love you carries hope in it as well, as opposed to hoping, and once he had realised that the words only became sweeter still.

Espio, on the other hand, is not one to say I love you.

It's not a fault of the chameleon, honestly, and Silver doesn't mind this at all either. The psychic knows Espio is soft-spoken and serious and practical and kind of smug about that, and yet he is also surprisingly easily embarrassed when confronted with his feelings. From what he can tell the chameleon prefers to stay far away from those unless left alone with the hedgehog as the only soul around to witness his vulnerability, and even then he has difficulty admitting to anything. So far Silver can only think of exactly three times when Espio said the three little words he himself loves so: the day they confessed their love for each other, that one time the ninja got near-fatally injured on a botched mission, and finally once when it just accidentally slipped out as Silver tripped over his feet and crashed right to the ground during their training together. The first time Espio had blushed so much almost his entire form became a reddish hue (chameleon perks, Silver had noted to himself with a huge grin as he firmly kissed his now-boyfriend again and again, if only to make the discolouration spread further), the second time the chameleon could barely remember due to his feeble state of being despite it being etched in Silver's mind, and the third time he had been utterly mortified as Silver squealed happily from where he had tumbled to the ground, too overtaken by love himself to even bother getting up. One time for every word that makes up the phrase, and each time meant wholly and fully and coming from the bottom of Espio's heart.

Espio might not like saying I love you out loud, but Silver is well aware he has a million other ways to show it. "Be safe out there" is spoked whenever the hedgehog is about to leave on a mission or just planning to walk around and Espio sees him off at the front door, which happens at least once a day. "I warned you" or "I told you to be careful" are cited particularly often when he has gotten hurt doing who-knows-what, be it fooling around with Charmy or fighting for the fate of the world with his life on the line, and Espio is left to patch up his scrapes and soothe his pain with his presence alone. "I got you doughnuts" is among Silver's favourites (though cookies are definitely okay too), although that is perhaps more because of the delicious sugary strawberry-frosted treat he gets on top of the tender peck on his cheek. Such phrases barely begin to scratch the surface of Espio's love language, nor does his means of professing love have to be said out loud for Silver to know. He can see it in how carefully the chameleon makes both sides of the bed every day they get up, the way his tail relaxes as he moves through the house and the hedgehog enters his vision, his careful instructions and peaceful aura when they are doing anything together, or the gentle way in which he holds Silver's hand or strokes his quills whenever he sees fit. Love doesn't always have to be expressed vocally for it to be there.

In the end it just feels reassuring and gentle and passionate and nice, to love and be loved, and Silver knows Espio feels the same way despite how differently they express it to each other. He can only hope their love will last forever, though despite his conflicted feelings on hoping there is no doubt in his mind that it will. He is in no particular hurry either to hear his beloved say the three little words for a fourth time, or a fifth, or whatever amount of times might come after those, despite how he himself has carried the phrase with him in his heart since the moment he learned of its existence. With all the different other ways the chameleon expresses his love there is simply no need. When the time is right Espio will bring the words to life once more and he will feel loved all over again, the feeling supportive and steady in his heart and soul, for every day he lives until the end of time.

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