The Oldest Morgenstern (An Alec Lightwood Love Story)

Chapter 5: Confessions and Memories

Pandora's POV

A month after the Mortal War

"Come on Clarissa." I said to my sister who was situated up in the rafters of the training room. "Just jump."

"No. I think I'll wait for Jace." Clary said almost quietly.

"Fine. I'm gonna go get food. Have fun waiting up there waiting for angel boy." I tell my sister with a roll of my eyes as I walk out of the training room. I walk through the halls of the Institute and stop by Max's room. "Hey Max wanna go to Taki's and get food and then go get some new comics?" I ask the youngest Lightwood.

"Aren't you supposed to be training Clary with Jace?" Max asked.

"I got hungry and Clary refuses to jump from the tallest beam in the rafters. She wants to wait for Jace to show off and have a harness with him." I tell the boy. He smiles before jumping up and getting his shoes on. We walk down the hallway and stop by my bedroom door long enough for me to grab a hoodie to throw over my crop top. We continued on our way out of the Institute and all the way to Taki's without interruption. When we walked in I looked at Kaelie -a Seelie who was a regular waitress- and walked over to her as Max found a booth. "The usual Kaelie." I tell the Seelie. "And I need the same orders for the others too." I walked away from the Seelie feeling her usual glare as I walked toward the youngest Lightwood. We eat our food once it arrives and pay before I also grab the huge to-go bag before we leave and head to one of mine and Max's favorite places. We walk in and Max runs towards the back. I walk through the aisles looking for a new book. Max rejoins me with a handful of new comics. I chuckle and grab a few books before we make our way to the checkout. I pay for both our things and we head out back toward the Institute as night begins to fall.

"Thanks Panda." The youngest says as Alec joins us.

"It was my pleasure, Max. Besides I needed to get out of the Institute as well." I say as I hand Alec the bag of food. He smiles before he is joined by Jace and Isabelle. Max runs off with his bag full of comics and my few books. "Drop my books off in my room on your way Max."

"He needed to get out of the Institute for a bit." Alec said when Max was out of earshot.

"Clary wanted to know when you were going to go and stay at Lukes." Izzy added as Jace nodded.

"Not anytime soon. I need time. I'm not ready yet to go to a place that isn't familiar. Besides, the Institute has been my home for a few years now anyway. I got used to not having my mom around and that's not about to change now. I'll go when I'm ready." I reply. They all nod understanding what I meant. "I'm gonna go on and go get some sleep. I gotta go get Clary in the morning for an earlier training session." I began to walk away only to stop when Alec joined my side. "What are you doing?" I asked.

"I'm just walking." He replied. 

"You're practically glued to my side. The only time you're not is when I'm not here. What's going on Alec?"

"Nothing, Panda." He replied.

I rolled my eyes and quickly walked away from him and headed for my room. I pulled off my hoodie and placed it on the back of my door. I walked into my ensuite bathroom and looked in the mirror. I grabbed one of the makeup wipes and wiped off all the makeup I had on before I looked at my reflection one more time. In the month that had passed I had suffered from countless nightmares. It was starting to show I was barely sleeping. I sighed before I turned on the shower and pulled my hair out of the high ponytail I had thrown it up in before the training session with Clary. I stripped out of the training clothes I was wearing and threw them into the hamper before I jumped into the shower. I shut the water off when it started getting cold. I grabbed the towel off the rack and wrapped it around myself before I walked out into my room and headed over to the dresser. I grabbed an old sweatshirt that says 'I'm not lazy. I'm on energy saving mode' and a pair of gray sweatpants along with a sports bra and underwear before I got dressed and threw my hair up into a messy bun not bothering to brush it out.