"Hi. I'm sorry to bother you. Halos isang oras na kasi kitang nakikita mula doon. Don't get me wrong ah, I'm not stalking you may binabantayan lang ako. And I was just wondering if you're okay."
Out of nowhere ay napalingon ako sa lalaking nakatayo malapit sa kinauupuan ko at tiningnan ko lang sya sandali ng umupo na din sya sa swing na katapat ng akin at bakas sa mukha niya ang totoong pag-alala.
It's not like I'm in the edge of the rooftop standing there. This guy is weird.
Napangiti na lang ako sa sinabi niya tsaka ko sya nilingon ulit.
"That's so caring of you." Wika ko habang nakatingin pa rin ako sa kaniya at tila sinisiyasat ko kung ano ba ang totoong dahilan ng paglapit nito sa akin.
He's cute.
"So, what's wrong?"
Sasagutin ko ba ang tanong niya? Wala naman sigurong mawawala, besides he seems like a nice guy and malaman niya din o ano ay hindi naman kami magkakilala at magkaano-ano.
"I'm just sad."
"Why are you sad?"
I heaved a long sigh before I answered.
"Coz I'm alone, physically alone, realistically alone dahil nag-iisa ako, walang kasama, ni walang dumadalaw sa apartment ko. I had managed to achieved the design I wanted for my home but it just feels so empty and pointless which I have never expected when I was still dreaming about it before." Then, I heave a sigh, again.
"Where are your parents?"
"They're busy with my brother who's a soon to be Doctor right now. Well, they are always busy even before. And my friends, I don't think I have one. All those years, I had been working hard to get to where I am now but why does it has to be like this? It seems like I'm nothing. I worked hard to live and to share what I have to those in need. For 10 years, I had been living alone."
"Aren't you the one making your life complicated?"
His statement made me smile again. He's right. I really am. I tend to isolate myself which explains why I feel all of this. But it's really hard to go back to them with how things are before.
"Maybe, I really am and I think I deserve it."
"No. No one deserves it. Well, I think you just need to go out and enjoy. Dont bother them if they weren't here to be with you. You just have to live life like it's the last day. Try to reach them more but if you truly can't then don't worry there can be someone out there who will help you up."
"Is he God? Or is she a friend? I always believe in God and He had always been in my journey but maybe it's the people who can't even stand my presence."
"Hey! You're not that bad."
I heave a long sigh, again and again. Thats all I can answer.
That guy, he stood and went in front of me.
"Come on. Stand up for a bit."
And without any question, ginawa ko ang sinabi niya. Tumayo ako at ngayo'y nakatingin na sa maamo niyang mukha.
Why does he have to wear that genuine smile? It kind of hurts me that i can't be as happy as he is. What a harsh life I have.
Nagulat ako sa pagkakatayo ko ng bigla niyang hinila ang mga braso ko dahilan para dumikit ang katawan ko sa katawan niya. Pinulupot niya ang mga braso ko sa likuran niya na kung saa'y parang niyayakap ko siya hudyat para maramdaman ko rin ang mga braso niya sa katawan ko, ang init na nagmumula sa kaniya, ang mga bisig niyang nagbibigay ng kakaibang kiliti sa tiyan ko. Ang yakap na ito bakit napakacomforting? Shoot! Naiiyak ako!
