The Hogwarts Houses

Being a Slytherin would include

- Getting excited every time the giant squid would swim past the glass in the common room.
- Having to stock up warm clothes because goddamn it gets cold in there.
- Everyone in the dorms having like 10 blankets on their beds during Winter.
- Having huge games of chinese whispers at the Slytherin table which confuses the whole school as to why all the Slytherins are deadly silent.
- Having the sassiest and most sarcastic conversations ever with your house mates.
- Staying up late on Friday nights with loads of other Slytherins and playing weird drinking games with firewhiskey while the minors watch in awe.
- Always defending people from your house even if you've never talked to them before.
- Getting confused as to why Slytherin is supposed to be the "badass" house because what actually goes in the common room is eating competitions and rap battles.
- Creating the strongest and most last-longing friendships.
- Passing notes in class saying "fight me" under your breath to literally everything.
- So much swearing.
- Everyone swearing all the time that you forget that swearing "bad".
- Getting told off in class for swearing "God fucking dammit I just spilled my fucking ink." "Excuse me?" "Sorry Professor ... slip of the tongue ..."
- Getting extremely stubborn when people tell you what to do, making you do the opposite.
- Not being a huge fan of Snape even though everyone thinks Slytherins worship him.
- Getting really annoyed when people are surprised at how lovely you are, despite being in Slytherin. Slytherin PRIDE.