A Night to Remember~

~Our Love~

~ Tsukishima ~

It was the night before Valentines Day and I was .3 seconds from a nervous breakdown which was so unlike me. Even though I had changed since high school I was still calm and collected most of the time, but this?

Had me terrified. 

I'm not one to easily show open affection to anyone, even my lovers but even so they knew just how much I loved them in each and every action I made. But even if they did know this is the first time I have ever considered doing something so open and drastically out of character. 

A few weeks ago I kept having this single reoccurring thought. 

I want to marry them...

So out of impulse I went into a jewelry store and bought four rings they were silver with a strip of gold directly in the middle each with a different inscription on the inside of the band. It was only after I had gotten home and hidden the rings inside my file cabinet did the insanity of what I had done register to me. 

'What did I just do? Did I really just do that? Did I seriously just go buy what I think I did?', these were the thoughts raging through my brain as I had started pacing the room. 

"What if they aren't ready for that yet? Am I even ready for this?", I shouted at the innocent wall next to me. 

The wall had no answer to give me just stood there with it's pale white paint staring at me blankly as if it was mocking me somehow. "Ughhhh", I groaned out. 

So yeah that's how this all began but now that it was the day before I would propose to them I was freaking out even more than I had that day a few weeks ago. I was so close to just taking them back and returning them but I know that is the cowards way out and I'm better than that. 

Forcing myself to calm down I pulled out my phone and pulled up my contacts to call the one person I knew could help me besides my adorable lovers. 

It rung about three times before I heard a small timid "hello?" come from the phone. 

"Yamaguchi?", I basically screeched at him. 

"Oh uh Tsukki? What's wrong?", he said immediately. 

"I am literally freaking out! I don't wanna do this but then again I do, I'm so confused.", I said clutching the phone to my ear like a lifeline. 

"Oh you mean the proposal?", he said softly. 

"Yessssss~", I said impatiently as I began pacing the floor next to my office desk. 

"Tsukki... I'm sure it will be fine why are you stressing so much?", he said in that calm voice of his. 

"What if they say no Yams? What if they aren't ready yet? What if they decide they don't want to marry someone like me? What if I'm not good enough for them?", I ranted as I began pacing the floor even faster than before.

"Tsukishima Kei ", I stopped in my tracks at his use of my full name. 

I remained silent and waited for him to continue, "You need to take a breath and relax, you have been together for almost three years now I'm sure you guys have had your ups and downs but you always talk it out together and then you're back to being disgustingly lovey dovey with each other, this will be a new milestone for you guys but I am sure they wouldn't flat out reject your proposal Tsukki. They love you so just think about that and gather up all the nerve you have and propose to them". 

"....." 

"Tsukki?", he said after I hadn't replied. 

"Oh uh yeah? My bad I was thinking about what you said, letting it sink in you know?", I said as I began pacing the room only this time not out of panic.