Young woman dictated: Once had a relationship with a decoration worker

After graduating from university, I went to teach in a school in Shanghai. At a school event, I met Zhao Hui. Zhao Hui is the leader of a large enterprise that has provided donations to this school. He is just over 30 years old, wearing a red suit, revealing vigorous heroism, but not losing stability. Won the favor of many people. However, he only has a soft spot for me.

　　At the end of the event, he asked me to take him to a fun place in Shanghai. His attitude was humble and sincere, which made it hard to refuse. We spent three or four days together, and in order to express his gratitude, he invited me to the hotel for dinner. On that night, he expressed his courtship to me. I hesitated for two or three days and asked my friends for advice. They all said that I was too lucky to find a big money without a word. I called my parents and they had no objection, just want to see him. We flew to our hometown in Shaanxi immediately, and he left the best impression on my parents, so it was so decided.

　　It didn't take long before Zhao Hui transferred me from school to Beijing, which is the archives office of the Price Bureau. He said that work here is easy and the treatment is the best. Then, on May 1 of this year, we held a grand wedding in Beijing.

　　Soon after I got married, I resigned from the Price Bureau. Because I don't understand business, and the driver of his company picks up and delivers the car every day. The car that comes is more beautiful than the special car of the director. It often arouses discussion from colleagues in the unit, which makes me very upset, so I left. Zhao Hui didn't blame me. Instead, he comforted me and said that in fact, at home, he can do more things he likes.
 
　　Zhao Hui is a rare good person. I respect him, love him, and trust him, but if I ask if I love him or not, I can't say clearly. What right do I not to love him? He spoils me, loves me, and is busy until 11 o'clock in the evening for this family, so that I can enjoy the best material life and accommodate all my shortcomings. He did everything that a model husband should do, but this is not the love I want. The love I want is like fire, which can burn me, or like water, can drown me completely. I am afraid of my own thoughts. But I dared not talk to Zhao Hui, and I didn't have time to talk.

　　At this moment, I met Zhai Ping.

　　Our house was going to be renovated again, and Zhai Ping led a large group of migrant workers. He was hired by my husband through an intermediary company. He has long hair, messy like a chicken coop, and very thin. I often call him an "arrogant body" because he is thin and strong, like a bone that supports a suit.

It happened that the husband went to Japan for a meeting in those few days, and it took twenty days to come back. So we got acquainted. His insight into life impressed me deeply. We talked in the living room, from early morning to dusk, completely forgetting what tiredness is.

　　I can't control my body to move closer to him, and my heart is also close to him. That's what he thought. So on a rainy night, we finished dinner together, and in order to chat quietly, I took away the kind-hearted nanny. He stayed that night.

　　The next day, I told him that he should take me away. And he was afraid that my husband would be held accountable. I scolded him for his lack of masculinity. He couldn't help nagging me, so he took me and left the city. Before I left, I still took 20,000 yuan in cash at home, which was enough for us to spend a while.

　　However, life is cruel after all. In this unfamiliar city, we quickly spent all our money, but Zhai Ping had no personal relationships in this city, and could not find a suitable job. He sighed to me day by day, I could only find a share in the supermarket as soon as possible. Work, but the monthly income is not enough to be squandered by him. After spending all the money, he began to beat me, scold me, said I was incapable, and said I was nothing.

　　I finally regretted my choice, and I want to return to my husband. Today, I know how much my husband loves me, and that he treats me well that no one except my parents can give. But what face is there for me to return to him? He already knew about the elopement between me and Zhai Ping, and he must have been told by the nanny. So, what should I do now? How can I make up for the mistakes I made, who can tell me?