(Title credit: MakeDamnSure by Taking Back Sunday)
PMORE WON A GRAMMY FOR AIN'T IT FUN IM SO HAPPY FOR MY BABIES. AND IT WAS ON JEREMY'S BIRTHDAY SO IT WAS LIKE A BIRTHDAY PRESENT OR SOMETHING
AND SPENCER'S BACK IN P!ATD AND HAD LUNCH WITH JON THE OTHER DAY I CAN'T HANDLE THIS
Anyways, enjoy!
-x-
Hayley's POV
Back at school, Alex and I didn't speak. We didn't even stand near each other. Jack wasn't in school today, but I couldn't give less of a shit. He slept with my boyfriend after all. Everyone knew that something was going on between us but didn't ask. Maybe they thought it would be too awkward.
I've been miserable all weekend. As soon as everyone went home on Saturday, I curled up on the floor and cried my eyes out. The only person I've ever fully trusted went and cheated on me. In my own fucking bed! Who does that? I hate him so much for hurting me when I was already broken. Absolutely hate him. Usually I cut at times like this, but I'm going to continue being clean. Not for Alex this time, but for myself. Now I realise that someday you really are the only one you've got. Might as well fall in love with myself since falling for other people is painful.
I still have feelings for him though, but that's just my optimism shining through again. Alex loved my optimism and taught me to love it too. Now I hate it almost as much as I hate him. Maybe I should be a pessimist for a change, and be realistic for once. I should've known that he'd break my heart from day 1.
How did I not see the signs? Alex is drop dead gorgeous and I'm drop dead hideous. He's talented, funny and well loved and I'm stupid, awkward and had only one friend for the majority of my life. What did he even see in me? I'm just a fuckup. Looks like he realized that in the end, cos look at where we are now.
I got rid of my orange hair too. Alex was the one who told me to dye it that colour again, and I want nothing to do with him anymore. It's now a rich scarlet, with blonde highlights. My hair's grown quite a lot longer since I last cut it, now it's at my shoulders. The group complemented it, including Alex, but I completely blanked him. Does he think saying my hair looks nice will fix this? Nice try Gaskarth, but no. I've been switching between furious and upset constantly since the party. At the moment I'm raging on the inside, but keeping calm and collected in front of the others.
For once, it was quiet in our spot under the cork tree. The tension had spread to everyone else now, and no one wanted to speak. This is exactly why I don't want anyone to know what happened; we wouldn't be able to simply move past it, it would affect a lot of things. Like right now, all our friends feel awkward and uncomfortable being near us. Is it really that obvious that I hate him?
After more agonizing minutes of silence, the bell rung for first period. I was the first person to leave, quickly saying bye to everyone (ignoring Alex of course) and rushing to get to Music. At least Gerard will be there, so today won't be completely shitty, I guess.
-x-
I was the first person in the classroom, great. I sat in my usual seat, took out my pencil case and put my head down on the desk. All this Alex drama is hurting my head, as well as my heart. I heard Gerard come in, speaking to someone. Ugh whatever, I'm too sad to see who it was.
"Hayley?" He asked, sitting in the seat beside me "Are you okay?"
"Mmpf" I mumbled, face still buried in the desk.
"Um okay. Can you look up for a second?"
With a loud and heavy sigh, I obliged. Two other guys were standing by our table, looking slightly uncomfortable. Probably because of me. They look really familiar, I think I've met them at the party. One had dark curly hair and the other one had a quiff and stubble.
