My World

Life

Let's get started shall we? You probably aren't too excited to hear about my life, but here goes nothing...everything actually. Buckle up...get comfy and get ready to enter my world. The date we're gonna start is a couple months ago. It was a bright fun October day and I was chillin in my room watching YouTube with my little brother (Brandon Farris) when I get a message from an old friend of mine. (Keep in mind that it's an old friend) I'm like what the frick? They haven't messaged me in a year. So I was annoyed and messaged him a not very friendly message...these were my exact words ready? Ahem...WHAT THE FRICK?! YOU HAVEN'T MESSAGED ME IN A YEAR AND NOW YOU JUST SAY HELLO OUT OF THE BLUE?! WHAT IS WRONG WITH U BRO?! I'm legit laughing while I wrote that out. I wasn't very happy with him if you could tell. I felt very ignored and started putting my shoes on for a friends moving party they were having later. Then they message me again saying..."look...I'm sorry. I really didn't mean to not talk to you" His exact words. I didn't care much about the "conversation" we were having at that moment. Whatever, if you wanted to talk to me you should have done it sooner...I'm going through some crap and I don't need you here to ignore me again...I need to go, I replied to his "sorry". Please don't leave! Was his reply. I turned my Xbox one off. put on a hoodie and got into the car. When we got there him messaging me out of the blue was annoying me to the point where I couldn't enjoy myself anymore. I basically just walked around at their house being bored and not knowing what to do. Fast forward a couple hours and skipping the fact that I legit cried into my friends arms for an entire thirty minutes which I don't usually do and I got back into the car. We had to go pick up my older brother and cousin from Bible study (they're two months apart in age) and my mom and I were listening to music (beautiful people by Ed Sheeren) when we picked them up. Fasting forward again to when we got home and my cousin left. I got online to lay some Fortnite with my friends and guess who messaged me again. I checked it and he said with excitement...You're back!!! Yeah...I guess so I replied back. I was getting really annoyed with him and ignored him for a couple rounds of Fortnite until his messaging got so annoying that I replied WHY DO YOU WANT TO TALK TO ME SO BADLY!? He replied with...because I'm really sorry and want to pick up where we left off at. Me, being a pretty friendly person, forgave him and said fine. The next day after school I got on and started watching YouTube again (LaurenZside) when he messaged me again Saying hello. I was in a good mood so I said hello and asked how his day went. He said it was great and better now that I was talking to him. Ummm alrighty I said to myself continuing my LaurenZside Minecraft binge watching. Reader.....please remember that sometimes you have to let people go even if it hurts.....so, reader....I let him go, blocked him and moved on with my three months......I starting quietly sobbing afterwards because I hate change and not knowing what was gonna come next. The thought of Is he okay still lingers in my mind. I've forgiven him because you know why? You live, you love, you forgive, you hate and you forget. You may love someone but hate them later. Eventually...all is forgotten and all you have is what's in front of you. I wish him well with his life as I've gone on with mine.....sort of..but what happened a couple weeks ago hurt me deeper than what I've ever done. A couple "friends" of mine decided to team up on me and scream at me for something my brother didn't do and what he's never do. I told them that as long as I live I will NEVER let them get to him. I was their wall...I was what was keeping them from getting to him. I yelled and screamed at them telling them to back off and to stop accusing him of doing something he would NEVER EVER do. I made things better with one of them and wished them well. I made them a promise I intend to keep and the other I want to burn alive. As she kept going and calling me bad things. There was a lot of cussing on her part which is not good for me since I don't say bad words and I was like chill (I'm Christian by the way) so I told her so. I finally took a final look at her messages and told her this...ahem...Pal....listen.....I don't care what you think my brother did...but I assure you that he would never do something like that...also, have a good life because I don't need more negativity in my life...I have more of that than I need right now...thank you for showing me how cruel people can really be when they show their true colors...but Pal...I don't think your true colors were worth showing...goodbye old friend. Thank you for the laughs and the faded happiness I once felt. Thank you for showing me Adam and how much he needed my help but I will not thank you for all the cruel things you've said about me because you've opened a wound that will take a very very long time to heal. She yelled and screamed at me again and I just blocked her. Reader...please...be careful with whom you meet...the colors you see in someone may not be their true colors until they are truly ready to show you themself. You, reader are a very special person. Do not let anyone else say you are not and do not try to be something or someone you are not because face it, you cannot be them...you are you and no one else can be you. Please listen to my words carefully because I don't listen to them often enough. I do not believe that I am a great person but everyone I've talked to says I am. If you believe so please comment and say so. Speak your mind and do not let others take advantage of you. I may not know you and you definitely do not know me but please listen to my words like if we were best friends. I'm sorry if you are going through a hard time lately just know that the good will come but so will the bad. Without the bad there would be no good. Reader, you are unique...you are so unique that there is not a single human being that can be you, you are so unique that no one can have has as many hairs upon your head that you do. And as a Christian I can say that God made you the way you are. Even if you are not Christian I hope that you continue reading and I promise that I will not be pushy about my beliefs. You can have your beliefs and I can have mine just like I can have my opinion on things and you can have yours. Thank you for sticking around for this long reader. It means more to me then you know. Reader......do you understand how important your happiness is to me even though I may not know you? Reader I bet I'd love your personality if you've stuck around for this long......thanks for caring......a lot of people don't......I'm not trying to be dramatic reader........I'm telling the truth.......I can not tell you how many scars I have on my back from the people that have stabbed knives into my back (that's a metaphor no one has ever stabbed me) although, It's a good feeling when you finally know when someone actually doesn't want you to go........some people come and some people go......the best part is they have a great impact on your life and they teach you things.....and some people come back.....some people don't but the bad part about that is.....you never know if you'll actually see them again....maybe you and maybe you won't....only time will tell.