Life Lessons [Park Jimin]

Chapter 22

Yeji

I've been in a bad mood since yesterday. I was struggling to keep myself together after seeing Jungkook with someone else, and then Jimin just had to go and make things worse. It was nice when he was comforting me, but then he turned against me for no reason. And I feel so guilty about the things I said about Haein. So this mix of sadness, irritation and regret have just been weighing down on me all day and I hate it.

I barely focused during my morning classes even though I'm kind of behind in history and the material in chemistry is starting to get difficult. I need to get my life back together. My priorities have always been 1) Haein and 2) School. Why have I been letting a couple boys mess with that?

"Yeji, are you okay? You haven't touched any of your food yet," Taeyeon asks with a concerned tone.

"Sorry, it's just been a rough morning," I sigh, looking up at the girl sitting across from me.

It's just us two since Minjoo is out sick and Haewon is eating with Taehyung and his friends today.

"What's going on?" she prompts me to explain.

I delay having to answer by finally taking a bite of my lunch. As I chew, I try to decide if I want to talk to her about everything. Or at least the part about Jungkook. I'm used to just dealing with things on my own, but it might be nice to confide in a friend for a change.

I decide to take an indirect approach.

"How are you coping with what happened with Seongwoo?" I ask.

She scoffs and rolls her eyes when she hears his name.

"I haven't talked to him since we saw him kissing that other girl in Hongdae. I was hurt for a couple weeks after, but then I got over it. Out of sight, out of mind," she answers simply.

Hm... This kind of aligns with what Jimin was saying. If I just stopped talking to Jungkook for a while, I would probably get over him too. But I don't want to because we are friends. And our situation is different. He wasn't leading me on like Seongwoo was doing with Taeyeon.

"Why? Did you run into him again? Did he say something?" she asks, probably assuming that this has to do with my bad mood.

"No, I was just curious," I answer.

"Okay. Then why the rough morning?" she asks again.

"I think I like Jungkook..." I admit suddenly.

"What? You like Jungkook??" she gasps in surprise. "You've told us that you are just friends like a bazillion times," she continues.

"Yeah, because we are just friends. That's all he wants to be... but I kind of want more," I groan, frustrated with my own stupidity.

"Are you sure? I don't think you actually like him," she hums. Her eyes narrow as she inspects my face, like she could somehow visualize my emotions like this.

"What do you mean? I'm pretty sure I would know better," I laugh.

"But you guys bicker and tease each other all the time. If anything, you guys are more like siblings than boyfriend and girlfriend," she points out.

"Please don't say that," I wince awkwardly.

Some of my thoughts have been very non-sibling like. I've grinded on him for christ's sake. But she doesn't need to know that.

"Okay fine, then explain it to me. Why do you think you like him?" she asks.

"I..." I start, but then pause. Why do I like Jungkook? "He's funny. And hot. And he's exciting to be around. He's always doing spontaneous things," I try to put my thoughts into words but kind of fail.