Skinny

Chapter 23

Hey guys, I would like to apologize for the long wait! My life has been pretty hectic and it's been hard to find motivation to write, but I've finally gotten to it. Thank you all for being so patient and I'm so happy about how many reads this has! You guys are amazing :) And I don't have Word on my computer anymore, so I don't know how long this is going to be, but enjoy :)

Will edit later :)

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It wasn't long after my talk with Gabe when Sasha and Robbie finally came to visit. My stomach was twisting and making me feel sick. I was so nervous about what they were going to say, knowing all too well a few words could set me off like the last visit with my parents. I was also very nervous about a conversation with Robbie that I was going to have. What if his feelings were no longer the same? What if he looked at me and was disgusted? I knew I had gained some weight since seeing them. Dr. Reynolds had been helping me with that. But I still had the urge to go back, and I knew how easy it would be to drop my new-found knowledge and continue my old eating habits.

I was walking down the hallway once again to Dr. Reynolds office. All those times the walk felt so long, but this one seemed to go by quickly, and it made me uneasy. Once we stopped at the door, I pictured Sasha and Robbie sitting in there, confused and hoping for answers. I wasn't one to take pity well. It made me feel uncomfortable. But I knew for their sake, I would try to keep it together.

Finally getting the courage, I knocked softly on the door. I could hear muffled voices get quiet. "Come in!" An all too familiar tone played back at me.

Sighing, I turned the knob and gently pushed the door open. When I took the first step in, Sasha and Robbie came into sight. They looked the same. Nothing changed about them, yet here I was, fatter and probably horrid looking. You're not supposed to think like that, Kylie. I thought to myself. You're not fatter, you're just on your way to getting healthy. That's what you want, right? I knew at that point my subconscious was going to start a war. 

No, you want to be skinny. You want those people to stop making fun of you. Remember how you thought you were healthy but Melanie and her friends still made fun of you? Yeah, that's going to keep happening unless you lose weight.

But Melanie was nothing but a bully! Her words don't matter. She's in here herself! You think she knows anything about good self-esteem?

But her friends aren't here. Neither are the other people from school. They'll shun you again. Make you feel terrible. Your family will, too. If you gain weight and become 'healthy' imagine what your father would say? Imagine how your brother would treat you. It'll be back to square one.

However, your family was worried. Your brother caught you binging! He wouldn't act like he used to! He knew he was wrong. He even admitted it. He confessed that he had been very judgmental! Your dad, too! He apologized for the things he said! He told you he shouldn't have acted that way towards you and regretted it! They just want you better, Kylie.

But you know that when--

"Kylie." Dr. Reynolds voice snapped my thoughts away. The look on his face was knowing. And I knew we'd probably have a session after the visit.

"Oh my gosh I am so glad to see you!" It was Sasha.

I watched her spring up from the couch and bounce over to me, finally close enough to pull me into a tight hug. I laughed and hugged her back, feeling a little better after seeing my best friend. I giggled slightly at her bubbly personality that I sincerely missed. "Hey, Sasha."