yours || xion X leedo

part fifteen

xion's pov

yes daily school routine. wake up. shower. bandage. downstairs. keonhee. school. yea that's all i do every day. no more dates. no more walking at the park. no more holding hands. no more activities after school.

keonhee is busy with seoho hyung. same goes to youngjo and hwanwoong. they're all busy. idk what to do left. geonhak? he's busy with his extra rapping class so i can't chill out with him.

honestly these past few days, i feel weaker and worser. i keep on having nightmares about my mark disappearing and about my ex. i'm getting more introverted each day.

i stopped talking to people in my class, i rarely take the opportunity to play on the stage anymore because i am scared and insecure. i'm getting so distant with everyone because i have almost no one to talk to.

hwanwoong spends most of his time with dancing because he'll have an audition later for the school's dance team so he is very busy and always tired. keonhee returns late every single day because of his extra classes and it's because he has to prepare for his singing competition later. same goes to seoho hyung too. not to mention youngjo with his composing thingy. and geonhak, we're not close at all and i don't want to disturb him.

nobody has time for me. i usually talk to keonhee about my problems but i can't even talk to him now. yes we go to school together but it's just feels so different.

i am depressed. yes i am. i realised that. i need help and i want to seek help but no one. absolutely no one has time for me. i feel pain every single day being alone at the house after school. i buy convenience store and delivery foods everyday because keonhee doesn't cook for me anymore.

my condition is getting worse. i'm in pain. literal pain. i'm trying to endure the pain but i can't. i ended up hurting myself even more because thats my way of coping. my ankle my wrist my stomach. i want to stop but i just can't.

nobody knows what i am going through and i will never let anyone knows this. they're busy and i don't want to burden them. it's okay, i can live a life like this, can i? yes i can. i can just talk to myself. listen to music, just alone. right? :)

dongju. stop burdening others will you? you're such a pain in the ass so just stop relying on people.

—:—

leedo's pov

should i call him? i got his number tho. but should i? let me check the time. ouh its 10 pm now , is he asleep yet? let's just try and call him.

              
                       10:41 p.m.

           calling son dongju ⭐️......

                   call answered

"hey whats up?" the male on the phone voiced.

"ahh, it's nothing, i just felt like calling you" i replied.

"oh yea urm thanks for calling. what are you doing right now?" he asked.

"i just finished my class and yea i want to talk and meet you? if you're okay with that?" i asked , a bit nervous thinking about what he'll respond.

there was this one quick silence until a voice replied " yes " which made me sighed in relief.

"where?" he asked. i'm thinking a place where its not really open i guess... but the cafes are almost closed now so i guess...

"my house? urm it's okay i'll pick you up" i smiled eventhough he can't see it.

"urm sure. give me 10 minutes" he replied then ended the call.