The Friendship Circle

Have you ever wondered who your true friends are? Wo has talked behind your back? Who has spread lies? Who means you grievous harm? Has your best friend has been sleeping with your significant other? Have you ever wondered who was truly your friend? There is an old Polynesian ceremony known by many names. But its most common is ʻO ka Launa Aloha. Otherwise known as The Friendship Circle.

Before you begin the ritual. Before you even gather everything you need, you should be absolutely positive about who you want to be tested. Once you and your friends start, there will be no going back. When you have selected the friends you want to be tested, you will need to gather the following:

- Anything to make the biggest bonfire you can.

- A traditional Polynesian weapon (Pololu, Leimano, Koa Sword).

- The Salt of Bor, Lith, and Ijen.

- A bottle of Okolehao

- Anything else you need to get your friends to the ceremony.

When you have everything you need, choose a spot near some woods to have the bonfire and wait until a full moon. If you perform this ritual any sooner, then all you'll be doing is throwing a party. When you know all of your friends, your significant other, and/or possibly will be coming, wait until nightfall before you begin the ritual. When the full moon begins to climb into the sky, gather everyone in a circle around the fire. Have everyone hold hands and move in a clockwise direction.

If you want to know who's jealous of you or who wants to steal everything you have, throw in the salts of Bor. Take a swig of Okolehao and chant the phrase "Aloha ku'aka'u (frenemy). Aloha 'aihue (robber). Aloha Kalaulima (traitor)." as you dance. The bonfire will combust into a brilliant emerald. Sparks will splinter and crackle from the now larger-than-life fire, shocking all who don't mean you harm into oblivion. Those who remain will be wearing tiki masks set ablaze with the emerald fires of Bor. You can choose to fight them to the death right then and there or flee into the woods. If you choose to run into the woods, they will not pursue you. However, from this point on, your life will become an endless war of cat and mouse as they do everything in their power to ensure you have nothing and cannot amount to anything more. Either way, the choice is yours.

If you want to know who wants you all to themselves or who wants to eat you alive, throw in the salts of Lith. Take a swig of Okolehao and chant the phrase "Aloha mea kūleʻa (violator). Aloha keaka (cannibal). Aloha Kalaulima (traitor)." The bonfire will burst into an ugly shade of bubblegum pink. Those who don't hate your guts will be devoured up to their heads by pink lava, their faces scorched into expressions of horror and agony. And those who don't want you to themselves...Will meet a fate far worse than death. Those who remain will be wearing tiki masks peppered with pink flower designs and a giant tongue. They will also be armed with shark-toothed clubs. You can choose to fight them to the death right there and then, or flee into the woods. If you choose to run into the woods, they will follow you into the woods. The only way to escape them is to find a place to hide until dawn or choose a place to fight them to the death. If you choose to fight them to the death, they will torture you slowly and painfully, eat you alive, and rape your corpse. Either way, the choice is yours.

If you want to know who hates your guts and who's currently manipulating you, throw in the salts of Ijen. Take a swig of Okolehao and chant the phrase "Aloha Kuhihewa (Misanthrope). Aloha pūkeʻou (Blowhard). Aloha Kalaulima (traitor)." The bonfire will fracture and glitch into brilliant shades of sapphire. Those who don't hate your guts will explode, and those who don't want to manipulate you will be flung around like a rag doll until all of their bones are broken beyond repair. Those who remain will be wearing blackened tiki masks and armed with shark-toothed spears, clubs, and torches that burn blue. You can choose to fight them to the death right there and then, or flee into the woods. If you choose to run into the woods, they will follow you into the woods and beyond. From this point on, you will need to either live a life on the run or fight to the death. Either way, the choice is yours.

The Friendship Circle is a highly effective way of discerning friend from foe. Many of the Polynesian immigrants who have been with narcissists, let robbers into their homes, rapists into their beds, and traitors into their circles have used this ritual to snuff them out. And many more Polynesian people are still using this ritual with the help of social media and other occult rituals from around the world. But those who have performed the rite and lived to tell the tale have done so as a last resort. Before you seriously consider performing The Friendship Circle, ask yourself, Is it worth it to know friend from foe? Either way, the choice is yours.