FMSA: Finding My Secret Admirer

PROLOGUE

It’s always stuffed with misery and clueless one.

It’s unpredictable and odd.

It’s a perplexed puzzle that can’t be easily solved in just one leap of the heartbeat.

…WHO AND HOW.

Anything could be possibly describe into it, like my sagacious life or my uncanny yet annoying secret admirer. I wish I could end the dreadful pain I had, cursing inside the deepest trench of me.

Magkahalong poot at sakit, sabay tusok ng mahahapdi at bumabagabang na katotohanan. Kung sana lang ay madaling bumitaw sa lupid ng aking buhay, nagawa ko na sana.

Pero hindi pwede…

Hindi sa ngayon…

“Help! Can somebody help?!” I yelled, letting my unending tears fell on my cheeks that made my vision into a blurry state. Hoping for a help. But no one spoke to reply to my cries.

All I can do is run all away that I could ever sprint by my own feet. Sa kadahilanang para ako’y makatakas sa kinatatakutang delubyo ko. This time, I just needed to escape to set myself free again.

“Eviee! Get back here! Come home!” A monotonous voice appeared afar from my back, raising goosebumps all over my external system. Habang takbo ng takbo sa napakadilim na lugar, walang pigil akong umiling.

NO! NEVER!

There’s no home I could ever get back too, dahil matagal ng nasira.

My eyelids were starting to forfeit and break down. My breathing clasped so tighter, together with the pounding beat of my heart. And my knees were doubly aching and trembling so bad which made me fell to the slippery ground as the sudden downpour of rain dropped heavily. As the latter, I started to panic more than just my limit.

I helplessly leaned my knees, heavily stood my fatigue body kahit ito’y napakasakit na. Nang nakatayo na ako, I was about to turn my head from my back to check, unfortunately I screeched in fear and widened my eyes from shock when the old man gripped tightly my arm.

“Eviee! Your gonna regret escaping again to me! I swear!” He warned, drowning me by his words. I can feel his overflowing anger against me as I felt the nails of his fingers dug into my skin.

DAMN!

“Let me go!” I said, gritted my teeth while trying to escape it’s gripping hand. Then as I fought an opportunity, I mustered my balling fist and punched his stomach. As a result, the old man groaned in pain making me an instant open course. Kung kaya’t mabilis akong nagpatuloy na tumakabo. Wala na akong pakialam kung saan man ako padparin ng paa ko, basta’t makatakas lang ako sa kanya.

This is my f*cking fault. If I only listen to my older brother, hinding-hindi ito mangyayari. Subalit kailangan kong mahanap ang mga kasagutan sa nakahihilong tanong sa isipan ko. I’m hungry for answers as I wanted to stop the delusions of my Secret Admirer. I wanted to put an end to this every mystery. Pagod na pagod na ako.

Still running for my own scarred life, I grab a piece of paper in my pocket and check to read it.

TRUTH.8pm.Reese Boulevard, Fountain.

-Your Secret Admirer

Malapit ng mag-alas-otso ng gabi. I still have a few minutes left. I just needed to find a way para—

BANG!

My hands responded quickly to cover my sensitive ears as I heard a very loud gunshot. Realization dawned me that it’s the old man whose holding a gun.

Mas dumoble pa ang pintig ng aking puso. Hindi. This can’t be happening. This is too much! Litong-litong na ako sa kung ano ang gagawin ko. Nanghihina na ang katawan ko.

“Eviee!”

My world stops, my hearing drowned and my feet glued when I am about to cross the street as there’s a vehicle running near my pace. I couldn’t move. Habang papalapit ito sa akin, mas sumisilaw ang nakikita ko.

Sa bawat patak ng araw, oras, minuto at segundo, ramdam ko bigla ang kahihinatnan ko. Pero pakiramdam ko mas gugustuhin at mas pipiliin ko ito.

Kung kaya’t ayos lang ang lahat Eviee…

Wala kang kailangan ikatakot…

Isang ngiti lang, alam mong matatapos rin ang lahat.

Expectedly, a putrid tears fell down from my eyes in contempt. Then slowly, I close my eyes.

“Eviee!”

Mabilis ang mga pangyayari. Hindi ko abot lahat. Subalit ang alam ko’y sa pagbukas muli ng aking mga mata tila ako’y namatay sa mapait kong saksi. Biglaan na lamang akong nalunod sa aking mga luha habang nahihirapang nakadapa sa kalsada.

“Hindi…” Bulong ko sa sarili ko.

Sa malayo, tanaw ko ang isang binatang lalaki na nakahandusay at walang malay sa harapan ko. Hindi ako makagalaw. All I can see in my entire vision is the blood scattered around the guy. My heart shattered as I saw his face. A curve smile crept to his lips, looking genuinely to me.

NO PAIN. NO REGRET. JUST A SACRIFICE.

Nilapitan ko kaagad siya, ngunit ako'y napahinto ng nakita ang isang puting papel na nakatupi malapit sa kamay niya. Sa pagbukas nito dahilan ng hangin, dito na ako nawalan ng lakas. Napaluhod na lamang ako sa kawalan habang ito'y pinulot ng dahan-dahan nang nabasa ko ito.

"Let me be your mysterious lover, forever..."

-Your Secret Admirer.