in your hesitation, i found my answer

we were nothing, but also everything at once

entering the great hall never changes. The same feeling rushes through you every time. It feels like pure peace, like nothing will ever be bad and everything will work out just the way it should. The smell is always the same. You think that because of the large amounts of different flavoured and scented food it would all be mixed and send your nose into overdrive. But no, its always that same familiar scent of home. some place you can trust and love. 

Sitting in the middle of the Slytherin table, with pansy to my left and Blaise to my right. something doesn't feel right. there is always a balanced feeling of safety when here but for some reason today it feels off. zoning back in I realise pansy has been telling me about how she hooked up with this one girl during the holidays. Her name was nova and she was a Slytherin in our year. they met at one of Pansys parents annual balls and hit it off ever since. I congratulated her with a half smile and continued to zone out. After what felt like two seconds pansy was tapping me agin and telling me we were allowed to leave the hall and return to our rooms before dinner. I stood up and walked with pansy. Its always so comfortable with her but today, she realised something was off with me. "Lucile, what's wrong with you? you're acting strange." I look at her and say "something doesn't feel right pansy. I don't know if its just me but I have a really weird feeling and its not going away" pansy shrugged at me as we walked up to the Slytherin common room door saying the password "pureblood". waving goodbye to pansy I walk to my bedroom door and unlock to see my trunk placed casually on my bed. Having a room by yourself definitely has its perks and I'm glad I got the opportunity to be alone. just looking at the bed makes me realise I'm exhausted. I honestly don't know why because I've literally done nothing today, but I decide to lay my head down anyway and get some rest.

I wake up to the calming sound of pansy fucking shrieking outside my door. Wtf?! I turn over and stomp out of bed towards the door. 

without even processing what pansy is yelling about I open the door and see her there red faced and sweaty. I'm so sick and tired of the screaming and I'm pretty sure the rest of Hogwarts is as well. I grab her by the shoulders and pull her into my room. She stops yelling and looks at me with wide eyes. slowly I say "pansy, calm the fuck down and tell me what happened. you sound like you just had your legs cut off. " she looks at me un impressed but continues to talk anyway. "ok luci, so I was sitting in the common room with nova last night and she asked me to be her girlfriend! and I said yes!" my eyes widen and I look at her with a massive smile on my face. "congrats pansy! I'm so beyond happy for you! you guys are going to be such a cute couple!" She literally can't remove the smile from her lips and just stares a me. I maintain my smile as she continues to tell me all about what happened. Until we both finally drift off into a long peaceful sleep.