Santana Lopez and the new girl

Part 15- try to look forward...

Six months. That's how long it's been since I got out of hospital and my dad was arrested. I'm still exhausted. The trials went on for almost three months, before they decided he was guilty. My mom had started drinking again, and there was rarely a time when she didn't have a stranger in her bed. I had been practically living at Santana's for two whole weeks now. My mom was not a friendly drunk... She would make comments about me and Sanatana, boobs and just general lesbian jokes to me, which made me think; maybe she wasn't all accepting of me. On the other hand I was trying to get Santana to come out to her parents. They still didn't know about us. I don't know how she was keeping it in! We played footsie under the dinner table, and made out at like midnight just incase they accidentally walked in on us. I was collecting missed calls from my mom and had deleted about a thousand voicemails in a week. When she finally showed up on Santana's doorstep, I think I was finally ready to just slam the front door in her face. But something kept me talking to her. She had a strange look in her eyes.
"You have two minutes before I slam this door in your face." She looked at the floor for a second, before looking back up at me, suddenly I felt like she was holding something back. I was kind of interested in what she had to say now. I raised my eyebrows, waiting for her to spit it out.
"I-" she looked at the floor. "Annie we..." She looked back up at me. "We... Umh- we're moving out. Next week."
"Wh-where?" Okay now I was intrigued. My whole body was shaking and I felt nauseous. She sighed.
"Pennsylvania..."
And suddenly my whole world came crumbling down.

"Santana." I looked into those big brown eyes I knew so well. We were sat on her bed and I was just concentrating on holding back the tears. "Santana I-" I couldn't get it out. I had no words. Zero.
"Annie?" She moved closer to me, tilting my chin so I was looking back int her eyes when I looked at the floor. "What's going on?" She tried to move a strand of hair from my face, but I pushed her away. This was too painful.
"I'm moving away." I said it. It was real now. This was actually happening to me. Time seemed to stop for a minute as I just looked at her, she just seemed confused. Upset. My head was spinning and the ringing in my ears started up again. I don't know how I was still keeping the tears in.
"Can I-" a lump had formed in my throat but I just swallowed it down. "I just want to spend my last days with you." She whipped a few tears away as I moved myself so that my head was in her lap and I was lying on my side. I felt her relax and lean back against the wall. Her hand rested on my head, stroking my hair. It was comforting.
"How long do we have?"
"What?" I turned my body so that I was looking right up at her. She just looked back down at me, a few tears rolling down her cheeks.
"How long do we have?" She looked down at my confused expression and laughed a little. "You know until you leave?"
"Ohhh." I felt a little stupid, but just rolled back over. "A week." She moved, rolling me off of her. I looked at her. Confused again.
"A week?" She looked upset. "That's it?"
"I'm not happy about this either Santana!" I looked at her, and took both of her hands in mine. She looked at me. "I love you. So much. I'm still processing this, I don't know how I'm still holding it together. I don't want to leave you Santana, or Tina or any of my friends. But I have to... I have no choice." The tears started slipping out.
"I just." She looked down. "I don't want to say goodbye." She looked me in the eyes now. "I guess I just... I figured we be together forever. It's stupid I know, but I did." She was laughing a little, making me smile. "I don't think I can ever let go of you." I stroked her hair back, and just moved to sit next to her. Leaning my head on her shoulder.
"You won't have to. This isn't a breakup. I'm not the only girl in this world, just... Just try to look forward. All that matters right now is that we love each other and I have you in my arms."