You're making things worse for me.. Why? (Harry styles) #wattys2015

part 9

-ALEXA-

it was now half term. i wasnt doing much for it.. its my dads birthday on monday so ill be going to his grave and spending time with him.

its saturday now, me and katy are going shopping to buy some new clothes.. ''lexi katy is here'' mum shouted up to me ''tell her to come up here'' i shouted back down

i looked at my arms which revealed my cuts that i had only done yesterday beause of harry i quickly put my jumper one and she walked in the door ''hello gorgoeus'' she said giving me a hug ''let me just put my jeans on and shoes then we can leave'' i told her smiling and walking to my wardrobe

we got to the mall and decided to go for some lunch first so we stopped off at nandos. we walked in and out the corner of my eye i could see harry and his friends. they looked at me ''slut'' i heard them shout ''i cant do this'' i said to katy walking out

she came after me well atleast i thought it was her ''lex'' i heard him say i turned around and there stood harry ''no, dontt.. dont even bother. i want nothing to do with you'' i told him ''i just wanted to say i told you this isnt over and it will carry on'' he said smirking at me.

thats when i saw katy getting out the grip of louis and running towards me ''what did he say'' she asked me ''nothing, just nothing'' i lied. but she doesnt need to know that.

i couldnt ever forgive harry for what hes done to me these past few weeks, he broke me!! broke me into pieces and brought back the horrible memories and nightmares. nightmares that ive had to go through all over again because of him.

''i want to go home, i dont feel safe'' i said to katy she understood me and we walked home.

well she walked me home then went home herself.

i stood there in my room crying my eyes out, i dont know what to do. i have the urge to cut myself but mum took every sharp objects in my room and locked them away.

i got the closest thing to me and threw it againt the wall smashing it.. glass scattered everywhere and i pick a piece up and started to cut again.

i look at what i had just thrown and it was a picture of me and my dad just before he was murdered i sat down in tears with blood pouring out my arm ''im so sorry dad'' i whispered in the air.

he was be so mad if he saw what i was going through. he was be mad that i was cutting myself. if only he was here.

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