To Love Somebody

27. quatervois

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quatervois - a crossroads, a critical decision or turning point in one's life

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Zander eyed the empty office. A place that had once been so familiar to him was now bare. Empty. All his stuff packed in boxes.

This was where it all began. He could easily remember the nights he'd spent at the office, fresh out of law school, as he struggled through each case. And all the hard work, he'd put in to make a name for himself.

He glanced around again as a knock on his door pulled him out of the trance he'd been frozen in.

"I didn't know you were leaving."

Zander watched as Natalie stepped into the room. And immediately, he felt bitter. This was also where all that began.

"I don't think anything I do is of concern to you." He huffed, reaching for his black coat. He didn't need to be in the same room as her and he didn't want to be in the same room as her.

"You don't have to leave." Natalie mumbled softly.

A quick email sent out that morning and now, she'd come looking for him. Apparently, Zander was leaving. He was really leaving.

"Why are you leaving?" She asked again as he ignored her. Instead his eyes scanned the empty room, once again.

"Zander." She froze as his cold eyes settled on her. And truth be, she couldn't even recognize him. He looked at her like she was nothing. And it made her feel like she was nothing.

"Don't give yourself too much credit, Nat." He spat. The corners of his lips quirked up, almost condescendingly. "Do you really think that I'm leaving because of you?"

He took a small step towards her, watching as she stood frozen with wide eyes.

"I've been looking for a new job. Especially since I won't be made a partner here anytime soon." Zander tried to hide the bitterness in his voice but he knew he couldn't. "Or did you think I would stay behind for you?"

"So you're just going to leave?" Natalie tried to hide the embarrassment that colored her cheeks.

She didn't want to admit it but a part of her had been hoping. Even though Zander never came back to her apartment after moving out, never spoke more than a few words to her at work, and never glanced her way, she'd been hoping. Hoping that there was still something between the two of them. Hoping that he'd still give her a chance. That they still had a chance.

"Yes." Zander's sharp voice cut through. "Although I like to believe I've made myself clear, considering the fact that you're standing here right now, I'm not so sure."

"You meant nothing to me. Whatever it was, it meant nothing." He watched as she stood there, confused, lips parted.

And again, Zander felt angry. Bitter and angry.

Because he could remember Misha. The floral dress she'd been wearing. The tears running down her face. His name on her lips and a hand over the baby bump. Because he could remember how Misha had stood there, in the driveway, begging for him to stay.

And he hadn't.

He cut Natalie off again, almost as though he didn't want to hear anything she was going to say.

"I believe we've both said everything we need to." He stressed, leaning against his desk. "Now get the fuck out of my office."

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"Welcome back to work." Nathan smiled as he sat down across from Misha who was too busy playing on her phone. "I've missed my lunch buddy."

"Is that a dating app?" He tried to hide to amusement in his voice as Misha looked up to glare at him.

"No."

Nathan chuckled as Misha quickly put her phone away.

"Really now." He teased.

"Who's your lunch buddy?" Misha asked, trying to change the subject.

"I believe that would be you."

Misha pressed her lips together, trying not to laugh. She glanced at the clock at the corner of the cafeteria.

She still had twenty more minutes. Twenty more minutes before her lunch break was over.

She had been avoiding Nathan. Ever since the wedding, she had been avoiding him. And even right now, she didn't want to talk to him.

He'd been there for her. When no one else had, Nathan had been there for her. But being around Nathan, it made her feel something, things she didn't want to feel.

"So why are you on a dating app?"

Misha jerked her gaze back at him. "I'm not!" She exclaimed, watching as he raised an eyebrow, taunting her.

"I'm still looking for a nanny and I don't have any more time off left so my sister promised me she'd watch Asha this week if I went on a date." Misha confessed, almost embarrassed at having to admit to the silly little deal she and her sister had made.

"Stop laughing." She mumbled, grunting her teeth together. She tried to ignore the fluttery feeling in her stomach as she watched Nathan glance at her, his brown eyes sparkling with mischief.

"That's cute." Nathan ran his hand through his dark locks before looking down at the bland salad he was having for lunch.

A part of him wanted to tell her, tell her how he really felt. But then a part of him was afraid, afraid of ruining what they had.

"Speaking of cute, your girlfriend is looking for you." He watched as Misha frowned before shrugging and reaching for her phone.

"Hi." Nathan almost jumped in surprise as Julia sat down next to him. He eyed Misha, confused as to why she seemed convinced Julia was his girlfriend or something. 

"My lunch is almost over. I should go." Misha mumbled, glancing between Nathan and Julia. She quickly stood up, rushing out of the cafeteria.

She walked faster as Nathan called out for her.

"Misha." She wasn't sure why but his voice seemed to be getting louder.

But Misha ignored it anyway.

"Misha. God damn it." And before she could take another step forward, she was pulled back against a hard chest.

"Ouch." She mumbled before taking a step back to put some space between the two of them. She tried to loosen his grip on her arm but he wouldn't budge.

"My shift starts soon." She repeated while she continued looking down at the floor, refusing to meet his eyes. Acutely, she was still aware of how close he was to her, even though she'd taken a step back.

She bit down on her lip as he loosened his grip on her arm before stuffing his hands into the pockets of his white coat, nervously.

"Let me take you out." The words rushed out before he could think about it. And without any hesitance, he repeated again. "A date. Go on a date with me."

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March 16, 2021 3:42PM

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2-3 more chapters left :)) thanks for reading!