Poems to chew on

Calum please dont read this

They are back again
This time stronger
Bulldozing the chances of survival
I may as well give up
I won't win so why try and hurt even more?
I asked for help
But I couldn't get through to people how serious this was
I wasn't just sad for a few days
Or anxious about a test
This hurts
Bad
Looking at yourself in the mirror with tears streaming down your cheek begging yourself to hold on and be strong
That pain that lurks in your stomach
the hard rock in your throat when you try and tell people how you feel
Or the never ending hopelessness that floods your mind
It hurts
And to keep it to yourself?
Hurts even more
But people don't understand it's not a choice or a lifestyle
It's serious
But you wouldn't understand
just how hard it is to explain what goes on In a mentally ill mind
Until you have entered their shoes
And Being in my mind is a horrible place to be
Monsters lurk around every corner
Just waiting for you to make a fool of yourself
So they can eat you alive
Why do I stay?
Because I know I would cause other people harm
I know that I would make someone cry
And I don't deserve that
I am not worth a single tear
I wish nobody gave a damn about me
Maybe I would do it
Maybe I wouldn't be so scared
to tighten the rope
To carve the pathway out of this life in my arms
Or even to take the last breath