Lauren

Chapter 1: Lauren

Zzzzz. Zzzzz. You eyes fly open at that horrifying sound. You hated your alarm clock more than anything in the world but you rolled over, turned it off. Reluctantly you swung your legs off the side of you bed. The sharp air stinging your soft warm skin.

You click your lamp on and open your bedside table drawer. You shuffle around until you grab your small dark notebook and black ballpoint pen and begin to write. You wrote about the first things that came to your mind. Your hopes for the day, your dreams, how you were feeling.

You had experienced a lot of trauma when you were away doing undercover work and your therapist told you that this is a good way of "keeping your head in order". You never thought your head was "out of order" to begin with but your therapist was the expert so you chose to believe that he was right. Either way, you enjoyed writing about all the things that popped into your head, in part because you enjoyed looking back and remembering days that were good.

You set your pen and note pad on your bedside table and stand up to walk to the bathroom, rubbing your tired eyes as you look in the mirror.

"(Y/N), you've got this. Everyone will love you. It's just a job, and you'll do great at it." you say out loud to yourself. That was another things your therapist encouraged. He said that saying out loud to yourself that things would turn out good was another positive way of focusing on the good aspects of life.

You had applied for a higher level job in the FBI not but one week ago and within a day or two you got an immediate email. Surprisingly to you, you were chosen. You had one interview with the head of the team but unfortunately it was over the phone because they had been out on a case.

You had recently taken a break from the FBI after you had done some undercover work in Tuscany, Italy. It involved an international terrorist and a small group of people who were hand picked to work the case. Being an undercover agent was very difficult because you had to hide many aspects of your identity and basically become someone you weren't. Even after you were able to leave the position and you didn't have to be undercover anymore, you still found yourself telling people your name was Elena Dursham and acting like the facade you put on for many years.

You hopped in the shower and rinsed off. When you were finished showering you wrapped one white, fluffy towel around your body and one around your hair. You applied a small about of makeup and blowdried your hair, leaving it loose and a little fluffy. You walked into your room and put on a grey, fitted pants suit with a white shirt under. You weren't exactly sure how to dress for this job but you figured you should at least look nice for your first day.

You grabbed a bagel and coffee on the way to work. The coffee smelled like heaven to your sleepy senses and you sat in tour car in the parking lot of the Behavioral Analysis Unit of the FBI and ate your breakfast. You were listening to your music loud enough that you weren't paying attention to what was happening around you. You were about to take a sip of coffee when you heard a knock on your window. You jumped, almost spilling coffee all over yourself.

"Um.... hey. Can I help you?" you asked awkwardly as you rolled down your window.

"Erm- Hi. Sorry to scare you. I'm doctor Spencer Reid with the Behavioral Analysis Unit of the FBI." the shaggy haired man said. You looked him up and down. He was very thin and had dark eye bags. You chuckled lightly when you say his mismatched socks. In addition to the socks he was wearing a pair of dress pants with a button down shirt and sweater vest that didn't quite match. He had a leather bag over his shoulder that you would see was overflowing with papers. He was clearly nervous as he kept biting the inside of his cheek.

You opened your door and stepped out of the car. You stuck your hand out to shake his. "Oh sorry I don't shake hands. Its nothing personal it's just, the number of pathogens passed when shaking hands is astronomical. It's been proven to be safer to kiss someone on the mouth than shake hands." he says.

"Is that an invitation?" you ask jokingly. The joke clearly flew over his head as he was taken aback by your question.

"Kidding." you say with a smile. He blushes and continues on.

"I saw your picture on your resume. That's how I knew it was you. (Y/N) right?" he didn't give you any time to answer his question. He clearly already knew you would say yes. "Didn't you work with the Organized Crime and International Terrorist Units? I read about what happened in Italy. Did you know anyone working that case? I guess you can't tell me because it was confidential. It was surprising that they were able to apprehend the guy. I'm just sorry he got away because-" he manages, before he gets cut off by another tall man. The man has an athletic build and you can see the wind pushing his loose t-shirt into his muscular abs as he walks over.

"Reid, remember what we said when we talked about meeting new people." the man says.

"Yes, you said, quote 'Hey kid, you know I love your random facts and that big brain of yours, but you can't keeping doin' this to people you don't know.' and I said 'Well why not. They always seem interested.' and you said 'No, they're just being nice.' and that's when Hotch interrupted us."

The man shoots Spencer Reid a look and the shaggy haired boy looks down biting at the inside of his cheek again.

The man finally introduces himself. "Hi I'm Derek Morgan, and you must be the new member of our team." he says looking you up and down.

"(Y/N), erm- (Y/N) (Y/L/N)." you say with a smile. "Do you shake hands?" you ask in a joking manner and Derek sticks his hand out to shake yours. You smile and the two tall men lead you to the fourth floor of the large building.

"And there's Aaron Hotchners office." Derek said pointing to a closed wooden door. "He's really nice but he can come off as very intimidating. Just knock and he'll let you in." Derek says warning you. You hadn't said much to either of the men. The whole experience was slightly overwhelming but so far, the two people you met so far had been very nice. You were nervous to talk to Aaron Hotchner but you tried to remember that Derek had said that he is nice even if he comes off as intimidating. You stand outside his door for a minute in preparation until you finally knock on the door.

You hear a muffled "Come in." from the other side and you push down on the handle and glide the door open.

Aaron Hotchner looked nothing like the man you had imagined but he was still very handsome. He looks up from his paper, and through his thick, dark eyebrows you can see his deep, brown eyes. You immediately understand what Derek says about him seeming intimidating.

"Oh, Agent (Y/L/N), come in, have a seat." he says gesturing to the chair in front of his desk. "I know we talked on the phone but here are some of the expectations of you as you join our team." he says, diving right in. He lists all of his requests as well as concerns and you explained how you could handle anything that was thrown at you. He cracked the smallest smile and shook your hand. "I think you'll be a great asset to this team. Your desk will be right there." he points to a small desk from the window of his office.

"Thank you Agent Hotchner." You say.

"You can just call me Hotch." he says matter of factly. You smile and turn around to walk out of his office. For a split second you smell and intoxicating smell. It was so recognizable but you couldn't remember what it was from. You glance up and see a sickeningly, familiar face. Those eyes, lips, shoulders, her whole body. You could recognize her better than the back of your hand. She was the most beautiful woman in the world but your stomach sank. Why was she here? And how did you end up in the same place at the same time as you. Your stomach felt like you swallowed a million bricks.

"Lauren?" you say in utter shock.