𝙃𝙞𝙨 𝙇𝙞𝙩𝙩𝙡𝙚 𝙁𝙖𝙢𝙞𝙡𝙮|| 𝙆. 𝘽𝙖𝙠𝙪𝙜𝙤𝙪

𝙃𝙞𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙄𝙣 𝙋𝙡𝙖𝙞𝙣 𝙎𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩

Katsuki was being too nice.

Kirishima had been best friends with the man for about 13 years now. Katsuki's idea of nice was not yelling at you and giving a backhanded compliment. Unless you were his wife or children, you didn't get the actual nice Katsuki. So Eijiro saw the changes in the man.

He wasn't yelling as much and was calling people by their actual names. While Kirishima just thought it was Katsuki being weird, that changed when Izuku chased him down and told him the blonde called him by his name. That's when the worry really sat in.

So Kirishima took it upon himself to assemble a team. He gathered Izuku, Shouto, Jirou, Sero, and Mina into his living room. "Why am I here? Sero's not going to let me do anything anyway." Mina said while biting into the muffins Kiri got them.

"Bakubro has been acting weird lately. I'm worried about him. Plus Kams is sick and he wanted you to take his place." Kirishima said, which made Ashido smile. "Just make sure he doesn't come out here, Bubbs and I don't need to get sick." He just nodded before giving the floor to Izuku.

"So during lunch, we made a plan. We're gonna do a stakeout." Kirishima pulled out a whiteboard and passed Izuku a marker. "So, I bought those camouflage outfits. We're going to go to Kacchan's house tonight, sit in his backyard, and watch him to make sure he's okay. Any questions?"

They all sat there in quiet for a couple of seconds before Jirou raised her hand. "I can't do today, I have to go to some business dinner with Momo." Izuku nodded before erasing her from the board. "Okay, you're no longer needed. You can leave now."

She blinked a few times, and Izuku motioned towards the door. "Jeez, harsh dude. If you're doing it tomorrow I'll join." She grabbed another muffin before leaving. "Any other questions?" He smiled, and Mina raised her hand. "I don't know if you remember, but I'm pregnant. I don't think I can do much laying in my best friend's backyard wearing fake grass."

Izuku pointed at her before going back to the board and circling the car he drew. "You're the getaway driver!" "Oh. Cool." She continued to eat her muffin as the rest of them talked out the plan. They decided on eight pm for the time, since that's when the sun went down. Once the whole plan was talked through and the sun had set, the group set off.

° ° ° ° °

The plan might not have been too thought out. After parking a couple of houses away and hopping the fence, they realized there were no bushes in your backyard. "We're gonna get caught." Shouto was shushed by Izuku as the four men walked through your background and got down. They could see into the living room and kitchen.

"What if they're asleep?" "It's like 8:20 Sero. Bakubro doesn't go to sleep this early anymore." The four of them sat there, waiting for something to happen. That's when they saw you and Katsuki walk into the kitchen. They stayed perfectly still as they watched the two of you walk around and talk.

"See, this is why we needed Jirou so she could tell us what they're saying," Kiri mumbled as he moved his hair out of his face. At first, it was boring. All you did was talk back and forth, and since they couldn't hear it this was kind of pointless. But then Katsuki grabbed your waist and put you on the counter, and their eyes got wide as the two of you started to makeout.

"Are they gonna fuck?" Shouto looked over at Kirishima, and the redhead shrugged. "Maybe they're just kissing?" "He's grabbing her ass." Eijiro gave Sero a look. "Well we all know Bakubro is an ass man so-" "He took off her shirt." "Maybe it's hot in the-" "He's taking off her pants." "Yeah okay let's go." 

The four men rolled to the fence before getting up and jumping it. They went back to the car and climbed back in. "So, did you guys find out anything?" They all shook their heads and looked out the windows. There was a non-verbal agreement to never speak about it again.

° ° ° ° °

Stakeout day two would hopefully be better. Jirou was here, and now they knew the kids were home and they wouldn't have to see you two almost banging on a counter. It was 9 pm, and they were back where they were yesterday. "What's going on?" Izuku asked as Jirou plugged her headphone into the wall. The family was in the living room, so that made it easier for her to hear.

"They're watching Princess and the Frog. I don't hear the kids, so they might be asleep." The men nodded as they watched. Katsuki did look really happy. Which made sense since he was with his family. But how did that happiness carry out into his work life?

The group sat there, but they all froze when Katsuki's head turned. It was for a second, but then his head turned back and looked at them. "Do you think he sees us?" "I dunno. He might not be wearing his contacts right now." They laid perfectly still as red eyes squinted at them. They could see Katsuki's mouth say "What the fuck?" Before he got up and walked towards the door.

"Fuck fuck he's coming fuck." Shut the fuck up Sero and be a bush." Jirou hit him with her earphone as they all watched the blonde open the sliding back door and walk towards them. "Why the fuck are you all in my backyard?" Katsuki looked at them, which make Izuku realize he really did waste his money on this camouflage. 

"Get the fuck up. And be quiet when you come in, my kids are asleep." Katsuki said before walking back into the house. They all got up and walked into the house, Katsuki gesturing them to sit in the dining room. It felt like getting caught by Aizawa in highschool. Katsuki put his hands on the table and looked at the five. "So? You gonna tell me why you dumbasses were laying in my backyard wearing... whatever those are?"

None of them really wanted to speak, but they knew the longer they kept Katsuki waiting the more he'd get mad. "Basically you've been acting all weird and happy and I wanted to make sure you were okay so I decided to do a stakeout." Kirishima looked at his best friend through the leaves on his face, hoping to not get his face blown off.

"What the fuck makes you think I-" "What the fuck?" Katsuki turned around, seeing you leaning up on the couch. You had dozed off and didn't expect to see your husband talking to five shrubs in your dining room. Katsuki walked over to you and kissed your forehead.

"So who are your plant friends?" "It's just the dumbasses." You looked back over, and they all took off their hoods. You let out an oh before looking at your sleeping children. "I'm gonna take them upstairs." Katsuki nodded and helped you picked both of them up then watching you walk upstairs.

Now to deal with the weirdos in his dining room. "Look, you're trying to tell me because I've been 'happy' you thought something was wrong with me and decided to lay in my backyard and watch me?" The group sat in silence and nodded. Katsuki pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. Before he could say anything you came back downstairs.

"You can go to bed hun." "Nope, I wanna know what's happening." Katsuki gave you a look before gently grabbing you and kissing your cheek. "See?! You're being hella soft right now!" You both shushed Jirou before pointing upstairs. She let out a sorry before putting her head down. "So is that why you're here? Because he's being soft?"

You couldn't help but laugh as they nodded. "He's happy because we've been having a lot of sex." They all looked at you with wide eyes, and Katsuki's face got red as he hid it in your hair. "You're telling me the reason he's acting like a decent human being is because he's getting his dick wet?

You had to grab Katsuki from not attacking Shouto from his words. "Dude, you're so fucking pussy whipped." Katsuki flipped Jirou off, only because there was nothing close enough he could throw. "Get the fuck out of my house you extras." They all started to walk, each getting a hit to the head as they walked past Katsuki and out the door.

He was going to buy a bigger fence.