Bertha, lovely Bertha,
You are a lovely machine!
And anyone who works with you,
Will know just what I mean!
Woh!
Bertha, lovely Bertha,
Sometimes I think you're a dream!
And when we work out what you have to do,
You can always churn the goods out,
Always churn the goods out,
We can depend upon you!
Clicking the day, flashing the night,
Your computer is shining brightly,
Some people say you've a mind of your own,
And I think that's very likely.... likely!
Woh!
Bertha, lovely Bertha,
Sometimes I think you're a dream!
When we work out what you have to do,
You can always churn the goods out,
Always churn the goods out,
We can depend upon you!But how did Bertha Begin?
Of course we all know Bertha was originally built by the previous manager of Spottiswood & Co, Mr. Wilmake's Grandfather.
But let's see how it really started after all that.
And this is that story
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"Now then, do you see that machine George?" Asked Mr. Willmake's Grandfather to him."Yes Granddad" said a 10-year-old Mr. Willmake.
"One day, this will be all yours."
"I don't know, that machine looks a bit frightening."
"What Bertha? Oh don't be scared of her. She's perfectly harmless if you're careful."
"Oh and one more thing. When you do come into control of the Factory, remember, treat your employees with respect and only, oh how should I say, 'lay off someone' if ABSOULUTELY necessary."
"Yes granddad."
A number of years later
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"Now then I must find workers." said Mr Willmake"But who?"
Just then, Mr. Duncan walked in.
"What is wrong?" he asked I haven't come for tea to be miserable."
"Well I have the Factory and everything else ready but I haven't any workers!" said Mr.Willmake
"It just so happens my brother has a mate who is a real 'whiz' at machinery and computers and the lot." said Mr.Duncan
"Well what's his name then?"
"Ted Turner."
"Now I'll just give him a ring and ask if he can come over." said Mr.Duncan
At Ted's house, the phone was ringing.
"Now then who could that be?" asked Ted
"Yes. Ok. Suppose so, yes."
Ted hung up qnd was on his way.
--------------------------------------------------------------
"Thank you for hiring me Mr. Willmake. You won't regret it." said Ted
"Well I certainly hope so Ted! Now then, would you mind helping us find more workers?" asked Mr.Willmake
"Well yes I suppose"
Ted thought.
"Oh I know exactly who to hire!"
"Well who?" asked Mr. Duncan
"Me nephew's friend John's mum has recently gone through divorce and needs a job."
"Oh well I really must hire her, what's her name then?"
"Flo, and she has a friend named Nel who wants a job as well."
"Ah well I'll give them a ring in the morning. But it's getting late now. You both come back tommorow, and we'll interview them and find more workers too."
"Ok then, cheerio!" said Ted
"Yes good day" said Mr. Duncan
THE NEXT DAY
--------------------------------------------------------------"So you'll really hire both of us?" asked Flo
"Certainly" said Mr.Willmake
Then, Flo gave Mr. Willmake a hug
"Oh thank you so much."
"Oh dear I am sorry" said Flo as she realized what she just did.
"Oh that's quite alright, but perhaps hugging wouldn't be best on workdays"
"Sorry"
"Now, would you and Nel help us find some more workers I could hire?"
"I know a friend of my husbands whose name is Mr. Sprott." said Nel
"Yes, I shall give him a call." said Mr.Willmake
Mr.Willmake did, and soon enough Mr.Srott was there.
"I assure you I'm quite qualified for uhh Design Manager." said Mr.Sprott
"Right then, you're hired."
"Oh I remember!" said Flo
"Remember what?" asked Mr.Willmake
"I have two friends that could work for you too"
"Who are they" he asked
"Panjit Sinh and Roy Willing"
"Well what are they like?"
"Well Panjit is an Indian immigrant. He is legal, but out of a job."
"I see"
"And Roy, well, he's Autistic, but only a little, and whatever job you give him, he'll do very well."
"Ah well they sound like nice chaps. I'll get into contact with them."
...
"Thank you so much for hiring me and Panjit." Said Roy
"Yes thank you very much indeed Mr. Willmake"
"No problem" but we need just three more workers. Would you mind helping us find some?"
"I've a friend from named Tracy." said Roy "I've seen her working and she would make a great assistant." Said Roy
"Ah yes. She could be my assistant." Said Mr. Sprott
"Oh and I know my neighbor would make a great assistant for you Mr. Willmake." Said Roy
"Right we'll have to talk to them tommorow."
--------------------------------------------------------------
"Thank you so much Mr. Willmake. It can be quite hard for a girl like me to get a job." Said Tracy
"Yes, and I should thank you as well." Said Ms. McClackerty
"Oh, you said you needed one more worker Mr. Willmake?" asked Tracy
"Yes"
"I know a tea lady, and I think she'd do great working here"
"Well I will call her now." Said Mr. Willmake
...
"You sure I'd be right for the job?" Asked Ms. Tupp
"Of course."said Mr Willmake.
"Well everyone, I hope to work many a year with you as my team!"
All cheer
And that's how Bertha came to be.