the man after the assault

the assault

       The bell rang as 100 5th graders hyped on sugar, running to recess. This was my favorite time of day, an escape. I usally explored the abandoned bulidings left behind from teachers getting laid off. The cracking of paint caused by the suns harmful uv rays combined with the use of cheap paint. As i got closer, the smell got stronger, it seems a family of racoons called dibs on the bulding where i used to sit and ponder. The curiosity filled my body, i aproach the family of racoons only to be hissed away. I took the hint and sat under the oak tree where the rest of my recess was spent admiring the family of racoons. I never had a picture perfect family, i never had a mom and dad take care of me like the racoons took care of their spwan. I never felt the warmth of equallity returned love. Wondering to myself "am i the problem?". comapring myself to these wild animals, i begin to get discouraged. i begin to think im differnt from everybody, i feel like an outcast everywhere i go. Mid thought my teacher blows the whistle, she yells "everybody to class", i jump up and pace to class. Now delighted by sweaty classmates, i quickly pack up my things and wait for my stepdad jasper to pick me up. Having to put on a fake persona of myself to satisfy the man whom my mom loved the most, whom my mom chose over us, i crave my mothers validation. My stomach starts to hurt as i see jaspers car, he drives closer and closer until its my turned to get picked up, wanting to just be with the family of racoons i pull the doorhandel to the car and greet jasper. "hi goodafternoon, thank you for picking me up" i say to which he relipes "mh". The hatred i have for this man gets stronger and stronger everyday. it was deadslient for the whole 10 min car ride. The early 80's throwback being the only white noise avablible. Now arriving at my old, busted worndown house, the negitive aroma filling my body. I have to read for 30 min everyday as my homework. But before i begin my stomach growls, "can i have a snack please" i ask jasper,he rolls his eyes and says "okay make it quick" estatic i got his permisssion, i go into the panty reaching for Oreos, the hairs stand up on my neck, i can sense him, hes standing right behind me. Thinking to myself "not again go please not again" " put those down saphire" he reaches for my my belly and starts patting it, implying i should get a healthier snack. Relived thats he no longer touching me anymore i reach for a bag of pretzels, his cold clamy hands slide futher up into my predeveloped chest. Im frozen, i cant do anything, My body trembelling with fear pushes as hard as i can, i cant win, hes too strong. His hands getting a tighter grip on my undeveloped breast, the more i resist, the stronger he gets. I scream, his hands on my mouth, now is my chance im out from his grip. I run upstarts with no thoughts, my mind is blank, head empty no thoughts. I cant grasp what happened. I go on with my day like nothing happened. My mom comes home, my sweet escape. Im still frazzeled by what happened but i try not to think about it. 

written by- lonelyfigure