Konosuba: God Bless this Fool and this Wonderful World

Chapter 1: Choices

I woke up in a completely dark room except for a light shining from above on me. I still had on the clothes I last remembered wearing, a gray hoodie with a t-shirt and jeans, my body also felt fine. Suddenly, a bright light invaded my vision

I could see the room clearer now, I was sitting in a chair in a room with a checkerboard floor and a circle of light across from a beautiful girl. She had long silver hair, was wearing a nun outfit, and she had her hands clasped in front of her with a sad smile.

Eris: L/N Y/N welcome to the afterlife. Your life was short but it is now indeed over. I am the goddess of luck, Eris, and I will guide you on your new path in life.

I had to do a double-take and make sure but it seems I did lose my life. I looked at her expression, it wasn't fake and she was sincerely mourning my supposed death so I just accepted it.

Y/N: Oh... um ok then, guide me on my new path.

Eris: Eh?

Y/N: What's up?

Eris: People usually don't just take their death in stride like that so I'm slightly confused by your reaction.

Y/N: My death was inevitable at some point, but I didn't expect it to be so soon and there's nothing I can do now anyway. Also, my life sucked so a new path sounds good to me.

Eris: Alright then...

Y/N: Anyways, how did I die? The last thing I remember doing is playing a game on my computer.

Eris pulled out a book from nowhere and began to read it.

Eris: Let me see... You somehow managed to forget how to breathe in while you were playing your game and died from a lack of oxygen. You also suffered brain damage so that's probably why you don't remember it.

Y/N: I see.

How could I die in such a stupid way godamnit!!! But most importantly, how the hell did I forget how to breathe!?!

Eris: I'll restore your memories on how to breathe and heal your brain before we continue.

Eris put her hands out and covered me in a strange glow. My body was automatically breathing again but I never noticed I wasnt breathing. I also remembered the moments before I died which I could honestly do without.

Y/N: I didn't notice I wasn't breathing but thanks. I assume I'm just a soul and don't need to eat or breathe.

Eris: You would be correct and you're welcome.

Eris had a pitiful look towards me while I continued to reflect incredulously on my death.

Eris: Uh anyways, moving on... You have 3 options to choose from for your new path of life. Option 1 is to go to heaven but heaven isn't how you humans think it is since you'll just be bathing in the sun forever with no physical body or entertainment besides being able to talk to relatives.

Sounds more like eternal damnation instead of heaven.

Y/N: Sounds boring so I'll pass on that and I'd rather not talk to relatives for eternity or at all.

Eris: Very well then, option 2 is for you to reincarnate without any of your memories. You might be interested in this based on what you said earlier.