what its like dating midari ikishima

<3

TW: Small mentions of suicidal thoughts, depression, identity crisis, sexual mentions ?

Midari Ikishima is a very interesting girl. And so, not surprisingly, your relationship was.. interesting, as well.

She became obsessed with you. Her obsession with you was different from her obsession with Yumeko, though. She was obsessed with the risks she took. But with you? Shes obsessed with- fuck, everything about you. She's obsessed with your cute laugh at her stupid jokes, the ones that nobody else laughs at. She's obsessed with how easily she can make your face go red. She's obsessed with even what you'd consider flaws. She just loves you too much. Too much for either of you to handle.

Honestly, her obsession with you scares you sometimes. She practically fucking worships you. She calls you her goddess, whispers "you keep me sane" during cuddling, and constantly calls you perfect, or flawless, and she means it all. She fucking idolizes & adores you. Her camera roll is filled with just pictures of you. Some of which you didnt even know were taken.

 Her obsession also makes her very, very protective. She'd do anything if that meant you get no harm. She pulls her gun on anyone who flirts with you, without hesitation. She makes sure that everyone knows your hers, which means a lot of PDA (Public displays of affection). She always wanted to be holding your hand in the halls of the school, or wanted your arm wrapped around hers. She also left a fuck ton of hickeys on your neck. Heh.

Her protective-ness makes her easily jealous as well. She doesn't want anyone to talk to you, but obviously cant have it that way. "Only I'm supposed to talk to you! I care for you, Y/N!" She says. "Someone's jealous,"  you'd mutter. "Of course I'm Jealous! Look at you!"

She'd love for you to shoot her, but she'd love for you to kiss her more which.. was very, very unusual for her. When she realized this, god she was frightened. Positive emotions, like love was unfamiliar for her.  It was also nice, and warm. You make her feel things. Not sexually. Midari is obsessed with getting hurt. Obsessed with pain. She craves for it because she doesn't feel anything. 

And that is why she was found pulling crazy stunts, masturbating with a gun to her head, taking her own eye out. Just to feel something. But with you, she didn't need to crazily gamble, or her gun to feel something. You make her feel. You make her think maybe there could be a future for her without pain being "necessary". That maybe she wouldn't have to carry a gun around.

She's very touchy & clingy, wanting you to sit on her lap, or hold her hand, or kiss her. She spams you with texts when your not with her, and sticks her tongue in your ear when your not giving her attention, making you hiss in disgust. (Which she giggles at.) She wasn't always so touchy though, and it took her several months for her to get used to physical affection. 

The first time you hugged her she shifted uncomfortably in your arms. She hadn't received a hug in years. She never received affection from others- before you, of course. Midari had been desperate, isolated. Nobody seemed to care for her. She felt out casted.

This caused suicidal thoughts and an identity crisis.

 That obviously didn't help her obsession with pain. 

She'd never met someone who treats her as well as you do. You make her feel alive again. (Her words!)

Lucky for the both of you, towards the beginning of your relationship with her, Midari started to go to therapy & was prescribed with anti depressions, which helped. She was always good with her words though. Calling you sweetheart, baby, babe, kitten, doll, love- aswell as whispering sweet nothings to you during cuddling. She asks you "How did I get so lucky?" when you smile- only making your smile grow. And your face redder.

Your relationship wasnt always the best, though. She doesn't have very good manners & lacks some common sense. One time she straight up asked "Why do you wear so much makeup?".  Midari is also incredibly blunt and brutally honest. She nearly never sugarcoats her words, speaking her mind without hesitation. As well as this, she's very selfish, stubborn as fuck- never wanting to believe that her actions could be insensitive. None of this helps in fights and you always end up getting hurt.

She's incredibly insecure- and has accused you of cheating multiple times. She always needs to be reassured that your hers, and that you don't have an eye on anyone else, that you wont up & abandon her. "I don't want you to leave me. I don't deserve someone like you," She'd weep. It saddens you that she doesn't trust you, but also that she thinks so very little of herself. You make her feel better over time, though.

She's also horny.. a lot of the time. She whispers lewd things in your ear no matter where you are. The two of you go on a lot of.. bathroom breaks. She masturbates to pictures of you  & moans your name. She also goes on rants about she'd love for you to kill her one day, and almost constantly begs you to shoot her, which makes you both sad and.. uncomfortable. You sometimes give in, (Even though she gets pissed when you don't) for her sexual desire, but never  fire if there's more than three bullets in. You've learned to tell by the weight of the gun.

Overall, its tough dating her, but worth it.

 You'd have to be madly in love with her to put up with her. Lucky for her, you are.