Gently, please

Sadlife

His skin was flawless, he was 6'2" and handsome with a dark brown hair, not too long but just enough to style it and a pair of dark blue lustrous eyes. Most girls prefer having tall boyfriends. Not because he can kiss her forehead and that he can hold her tightly to his heart but also because they feel more protected when they're near. I was a stupid woman . I must've been. I thought my life would always be sunshine and rainbows when I found out I was passing through fire. Well, It still has it's burns. Not a single call or a message! I was very much broken at the beginning but as they say "Everything will pass" I waited and waited. Waiting was not even something. I was torn apart. Either my pillow soaked up the water from my tears or my clothes. I was usually sitting in the corner of the room. I must say I hated the world at that moment. For me happiness was like the will of the wisp, the more I tried to find it the further it flew. Can you love some one that much that you can give them away?
I had definitely realized one thing in life. When you sit in the corner of the room and cry no one is going to help you. You have to pick yourself, no one is going to notice you, you will be alienated and start regretting life because you think about the negative side of it. Smiles and joys were miracles. The pain will push you so hard that you will not be able to look up to see what is happening . I was not a girl who had a happy childhood. To tell the truth I never really knew what was happening. I used to visit my neighbor's house when I was 8 pretty much every other day and once this boy around 14 or 15 years old pulled me to his room during a function which took place in house and raped me every day until my aunt took me to the hospital the other day and found out I was raped when the doctor noticed when I was not able to do a few exercises . I was hardly educated about this. It had been 4 years since my mother had passed away. I never knew the meaning of the "good touch" and the "bad touch" I used to cry everyday feeling the pain in my vagina. Some days all I used to see was blood in my panties and that is not a very common thing to be looked at when you're 8.