As Cold As Ice // Charlie Gillespie

Chapter 12

I can't wait to get to the rink. The last two periods have felt like an eternity. I couldn't really focus on any of the topics we discussed. I couldn't get what Sarah said out of my head. Am I jumpy when it gets to Charlie? I know I get annoyed really quickly when she sees things that aren't there but that's it. But then why does my heart skip a beat when we touch accidentally? And why do I get those weird feelings when he smiles a certain way? Am I actually falling for him? That can't be! It's crazy! We're friends at best. I hardly know him.

Luckily the boys have gym practice today while I have skating so I don't need to stick around another hockey practice waiting for Charlie. It feels good being on the ice again. I really needed this. We skate a few rounds to warm up before Coach Lewis calls us over to let us know what we're doing today. "Girls, I know the competition is still almost four months away but it's time to start thinking about your programs. I want you to feel good about what you're doing so until next practice I want you to give me a list of a couple of songs you could consider doing a program to." We all nod, waiting for her to continue. "Today I want you to work on some basic elements. No jumps today. Go ahead. I'll come to each of you individually with comments and suggestions." That's something I love about Coach Lewis. She gives us the chance to find something that feels right. We can decide alongside her. She puts on some music so we can continue to practice. I take a deep breath and let my body take over.

While I'm skating my mind starts to wander. Instead of making me feel free and weightless I get stuck in my thoughts today. That never happened before. Usually skating is my escape from everything. While I practice some basic elements I constantly catch myself thinking about Charlie. About the feeling of his arm wrapping around my waist this morning. How awful I felt not knowing what was wrong last night. I think back to all the moments between us and I can't believe it's only been three days so far. From the first moment we acted so natural around each other, like we've known each other for ages. Slowly I'm starting to think Sarah might not be entirely wrong. At least about me. I doubt Charlie feels the same. He's just a genuinely nice guy and I mean he's living with me, he doesn't have a choice but try to get along with me.

Completely lost in my thoughts I almost automatically start doing a Salchow but I trip because I'm not fully focused. Luckily I can catch my balance without hurting myself but my pulse is suddenly racing. "Mia! I said now jumps!" Coach Lewis comes skating over to me. "Are you alright?" I nod my head. "Sorry, I didn't wanna do it... my body did." Coach Lewis nods understanding. "Mia, I know you but you still have to focus sometimes. I don't want you to get hurt." She's right, I know that. The fact that my body automatically builds itself a choreography to music is a big bonus when trying to develop a program but in some cases, like right now, it's also not the best thing. "It won't happen again."

For the rest of practice I manage to keep my thoughts, mostly, in check. "Mia why did you jump?" Kaylie is sitting next to me in the locker rooms. I shrug "I didn't plan to. It just happened." - "Mhm." The girls don't understand it. I tried explaining how my body just takes over on the ice but they don't get it because it doesn't happen for them. It's really frustrating at times to have no one to truly talk to about this. I take my time storing away my stuff. It feels weird having to face Charlie after everything I thought about today. But I guess it doesn't have to be. I just have to act normal, like I never realized I might like him a little more than I should.

When I walk towards my car I can see Charlie already waiting, casually leaned against it. Biting my lip a little I must admit he looks really good. His hair is still wet from his shower after gym practice and I can feel my fingers tingling with the urge to brush a strand that's hanging into his face behind his ear. I swallow hard before I take the last few steps towards him. A bright smile on his face he says "Finally!" I roll my eyes and softly punch him as I walk past him towards the drivers side. Once we're both sitting in the car Charlie carefully says "Mia, what's wrong?" Why on earth can people read me so well? I didn't think I was acting any different. "Nothing. I just made a stupid mistake at practice." It's only partly a lie. I do still feel bad about loosing focus and almost hurting myself.

"What happened?" Sighing a little I tell him how I did a jump even though we weren't supposed to. "But why did you do it then?" I know it's pointless to explain but I do it anyways. "Because when I'm on the ice it's like my body takes over. The music is flowing through me and my body automatically matches elements to it." Charlie is quiet for a second but when I look over at him I catch him staring at me intensely. "What?" - "I know that feeling." My eyes widen. "You do?" He clearly must be joking. "Yeah... it's what I feel with music. When I grab my guitar it's like... I don't know, my hands just know what to do." - "No one ever understood this before." I can't believe I found someone who does.