I LOVE YOU

Chapter 1

        One afternoon, in school I went to clinic co' z I had a headache. On that day I'm very sad because that was my first clinic check-up that I had. Awhile, ago I'm sitting on the chair and I was thinking out of my mind, I'm not in the mood, so, I never mind those negative things about my health. After a few minutes beside my chair there was a girl I don't know why she looking at me and she glance her eyes to me. it seems like everything was perfect to me and I was thinking "is it love at first sight?" that was my romantic day when she's glancing. I couldn't help myself, so, I introduce myself with her, I take his hand to shake hands.

        I said,"Hi my name is Jesse Go how about you?" She felt uncomfortable but she didn't notice that his hand already hold to my hand and her cheeks blushed just like a red tomatoes.

        She replied, "My name is Kharl Grace Montana" She smiled at me. The check-up was already done, I never expect that she is a working student and his job is to assist the doctor in the clinic office.

        One evening, I recall the face of the girl and I was thinking about it seems just like a face of my ex-girlfriend. I lay down on my bed at 7:30 o'clock. it is my hobby to listened love song and I love music co' z many of us can relate in every single words to lyrics and it's meaningful to understand those songs, I'm on head set play a music sang by Ray Parker entitled "The Past", I'd always remember my past and I'm not totally move on in two months of sufferings of love, I really relate this song, co' z before I felt love was suffering on that bleeding me back had been cut by the painful. While I felt that pain, it was the mental and spiritual anguish that caused my greatest suffering. I never thought that I could fall in love to her, I imagined those unforgettable moments we're I'm in relationship before and I just wanted to tell her how things turned out and it reminds you how I thought for sure I was in love. I was crazy, man. My head felt light as a feather. I got weak and almost fainted and all this day, all this pain, it's gonna be invisible. My appetite was shot and I couldn't even look at food. My mom told me I looked terrible and she called the doctor.

        I said , "well, it wasn't love at all. It was the flu mom..."

        Jesse thought it was love when it was the flu...there are many others also thought it was love, but then it flew.

        5 o'clock in the morning, I woke up and writing a letter for my ex-girlfriend I'd always remember her face, the personality, the kind of person the partner really is. The habits and the inner or vices and her loving heart character the inner self. After all, I already done my doing. I said to mom "bye mom, I'm going to school now" mom replied, "did you breakfast?" son answered, "No, goodbye mom" his mom felt concern to the health of Jesse.

        At gymnasium , walking itself on the road were the place I met her before and while I walk I see her acroos of the road with another man holding hands, I felt an broken hearted again with the cries of angry and the guilt of heartless, I can't be comfortable when I see her holding someone.

        After a few days, I came back to the place, In timing they're have a class on the gymnasium subject " Physical Education" they're doing some exercises and I take time to find his bag to put my letter which I wrote awhile ago.

        In time, I put the letter on his bag and during putting a letter I felt the furious and painful. She opened it his bag for find something, While she keep looking her pencil she notice aside of the notebook there was a white envelope, then, now she picks-up the white paper and thinking "is it a letter?" She opened it . She felt shocks! co' z it was a letter, She's start  reading.

        Dear Maris,

                I just wrote a letter for you. To remind you how much I love you. I always remind our past, It reminds me the laughter that we shared and thats rooted to our relationship.

           Time comes, and years by, we will not see each other, talk nor texting. Until such time I realize that I have my own life too. and with that, It gives me confidence when I entered this college world, knowing that I will be hurt again to someone. "finding you is hard". I believe in that but if I learn to wait you, you will be someday miss me and realizing that you hurt me. But even if you don't want to talk to me. I am still waiting for your voice, and waiting that we could be friends again. No hurt anymore but still pretending I'm not affected, even if you find someone, I am still waiting and waiting for till you back.

                At least I try my best and effort to you but it seems it's too much for me to give and to give another chance. But I realized yesterday that you find someone boy better than me. It felt melt inside. I have no choice. It's your decision and only god knows, how I treasure you most. " I LOVE YOU", but I have to left love on myself too. I move on but not totally, co' z, there's a little bit left inside of me saying "you have to wait " and I don't know if I have to wait you or not. Co' z it seems you find him. I hope you'll be happy with him. It does not mean I give up you and letting you go, I just here watching you, with a smile and welcoming you again. Thanks!! For everything we shared, I've really enjoy your company.