Have you ever watched the snow fall? Watch it delicately make contact with the ground, a soft kiss of precipitation from mother earth. Watch it pick up the pace until it's hard to see anything other than snow. You probably have, but have you looked past all that, as far as you could see. Have you watched those snow flakes? They go much slower. Rocking gently back and forth like bits of feathers, to and fro. When the wind blows just right everything seems to stop... and slow down. Breathtaking. We get caught up in the clutter of snowflakes. They make it hard to see anything else, ones that are so straight forward, a to b. Behind those though are drifters, carelessly carried around by the wind of life. To end up mud and sand covered in a snow bank on the side of the road. Sad really, but past all that, the snow flakes on the edge of your vision. Those are the most interesting, struggling with the wind and onslaught of other snowflakes they try to be noticed, and I did notice. Noticed that they are the most beautiful bits of magnificent feathers from an angel. Life is measured not in how many breathes you take, but by how many moments take your breath away and I was left gasping.
Lying there I desperately struggled to breathe, scrambling for my inhaler. Where is it? My hand searching the ground earnestly to sort through the snow.
"Are you okay," my assailant said frantically. "I know CPR!"
Suddenly the warmth of the sun was gone and in its place was a shadow that covered my face. With it came the feeling of something soft pressing against my mouth. The warmth of her breath and the taste of mint came rushing. My thoughts were fog covered as I tried to process the situation. Snapping back to the realization that I need to breathe I managed to feel around till I came in contact with the cold hard plastic container of my inhaler. Gripping it, I tried to push her off, but her weight was overpowering.
I...need...to...breathe.
Giving one final push, I could feel her weight lift off of me.
Breathe out.
Press button.
Breathe in.
Press again.
Hold breath.
My life, chained by the shackles of bronchial asthma. I hate to think that something so small as an inhaler can make the difference of life or death...scary.
"I'm so sorry, I didn't know you were asthmatic, I thought...and I hit you...tried to swerve...but my bike..." she rambled on."Are you okay," she finally asked.
I managed to choke out," I'm alright."
Wobbling to my feet, I steadied myself. Slipping on the snow I revisited the ground.
"I'm just going to stay here for a bit," I said defeated.
"Ummmm...okay. I'm really sorry about...the whole. Thing."
I have always wanted to get knocked off my feet by a gorgeous girl, but I didn't expect it to be like this. There she stood, the blush on her face spreading across her freckled skin. Only stopping to meet her eyes, like a cloudy day that reminded me of times wrapped up in a warm blanket reading a book with the soft patter of rain. It seemed so cold without her next to me.
"Don't worry about it, I won't tell anyone," I told her.
"And I won't tell anyone either," she said as she got back on her bike.
She will probably remember me as asthma attack boy and she is...she is?
No!
I didn't get her name. Come on! Sitting in the snow, with probably an icicle forming down my chin, I watched her ride off. Any chance of hope was fleeting as she gradually disappeared from my sight.
