Im in a world where everything is completely perfect, this Utopian Society is Called "Foreland" at least thats what "They" told me when I was 3. Ever since then I get told what to do, and how to do it, I get told how to speak and who to speak to, and I get told what to say. I also get told where I shall be and shall not and at what times. And that if I ever go past the gates of Forland, my life would never be the same again. I have considered going past the gates, just to change my life, to have a different life, change seems to be unheard of here. My curfew is 7pm and "They" told me that for my own safety, I had best be inside before the clock in the middle of Foreland turns to 7. My old friend Jason was out past curfew about a month ago, but after that Thursday night I never saw him again, "They" told me he moved.
Your probably wondering who "They" are, but I couldn't tell you even if I wanted to, because I don't even know, my Mother and Father said that "They" came to the house when I was born, Mother said they had to put myself into me and those selves into me, so on and so forth, I have not yet learned what that means but I have never forgotton those words. It pulls my mind apart not knowing what it means.
My whole life, which is 15 years, I have been told who I must be, and what I must do, I don't know what it feels like to be my own person, and I don't know who I am, so I guess I can't complain. But Life is a lie here, from what i've discovered, this place is all fake, at least thats what I assume, I assume that this life is fake, but I dont care, because according to "They" I have many lives, many me's, many selves. As to how many I cannot fathom, but I will find out eventually. I will learn my lives, every last life I have I will learn about them all, and once I have learned what lives I posess I will choose a life, only one of my lives, I will get out of this place. Eventually.
As time goes by I still don't understand how there can be more than one of myself, if I am me, how can there be more than one of me, how can I have my body and my mind, and all of my own thoughts, if there's many of me? I have asked my father about this on numerous occations but he comfortably and diligently changes the subject, as if I never asked the question. It's difficult living here, however most who live in Foreland would disagree, I get told everything I must do and at the exact times, and "They" expect it to be done, all of it. But it seems as though being told what to do is harder than doing what I would like. I get my day schedule, when I wake each morning, being the only child in the household, both my Mother and Father come in, having no other children to tend to.
In the mornings when i wake, my parents come in, they give me hugs, then "They" call and order me to take my 3 pills, read through my schedule then go get ready for my school day, when "They" call, the voice is always loud, firm, and the voice usually changes from female to male every few days. I take a red bus home like everyone does after school, and I do my chores, then I shower and get dressed in my outdoor clothes, then I leave my house to see my three friends Caitlynn, Samson, and Sara. We then walk to the forest and speak following the scripts "They" give us daily. Then we would walk back the exact same way we came, and go our seperate directions, to our homes. When I get home I wash my hands and change into my dinner clothes.
Once we have dinner I do the outdoor chores assigned to me, and greet my neighbors kindly, to lift everyone's spirits I presume, in this place, you need that sometimes. Once I am finished I go inside exactly one minute before 7pm, and I watch outside as the sky goes dim, stars come out, and street lights go off. Every few months, I see people outside after the clock sounds for curfew, then see them taken away in white vans. As I saw Jason taken away, before he "moved". Pfft, moved, right. Before I go to sleep "They" call the house phone, which is only to be used to answer when "They" call. My Father speaks to them, then my Mother, then she brings me the phone, "They" then tells me if I did well, or if I need to follow my day plan better the next day I then go to sleep almost instantly. As if a switch is slowly turning me off.
YOU ARE READING
My Many Selves
Non-FictionNameless, yet many personalities. Have you ever thought of what it would be like to have many of yourself, and if they are different or the same? Or that someone else was running your entire life?
