Misunderstanding

Saifah happily hummed to himself as he picked out snacks and drinks from the fridge of the convenience store. Despite being tired from studying, he was always in a good mood these days. This was mainly because him and Zon were finally getting along lately. Ever since Zon agreed to perform a song with him, he'd been much nicer towards him and not getting as angry or defensive as before. It was enough to renew Saifah's hopes of them becoming friends, or possibly even something more.

Exiting the store, Saifah heard Junior's loud and distinct voice from the open restaurant across the street. His spirits soared and he smiled widely as he recognised Zon's figure sitting with his usual gang of noisy friends. Would it be too intrusive if he went over and said hi? But, then again, it would be rude to pretend not to have seen them. Saifah was trying to decide what to do when he saw Tutor arrive and sit with them. A broad smile spread across his face. It wouldn't be odd for him to stop and say hi to Tutor in passing.

Nervousness began to bubble within as he crossed the street. He ran his fingers through his hair hoping to make it look less messy than it was. Saifah had woken from a nap and had come out to the store to get dinner and some snacks for breakfast without bothering about his appearance. He'd never expected to see Zon nearby hanging out with friends at this hour. 

Saifah was almost at the restaurant and thinking about how to make his entrance when he heard his name spoken. He looked over at the table, but none of them were looking his way. They hadn't noticed him yet. Why did he hear his name? Were they teasing Zon about the performance again? Saifah's smile was replaced with a frown as he hesitated. Perhaps he shouldn't go over after all. He didn't want Zon to feel uncomfortable because of him.

"Seriously! Saifah! Saifah! Saifah!" shouted Zon with annoyance while holding his head in his hands. He looked up at his friends with pain filled eyes. "Can you guys stop talking about him? I'm sick of it! I already have to see him so often lately it's driving me insane! I can't stand it! Just hearing his name makes me so stressed I wanna die!"

Saifah stumbled back a few steps, his face going pale from shock. Zon's words hit him viciously, shattering his hopeful heart into pieces. Was that how Zon truly felt? Saifah clutched his chest as a sharp pain pierced his heart. He'd been aware Zon wasn't particularly fond of him because of what happened between them last year, but... he never thought Zon disliked him to such a degree. Saifah turned and slowly walked away still reeling from the shock of what he'd heard.

Tossing the bag of food and drinks on the floor, Saifah flopped facedown onto his bed the moment he arrived back at his room. The emotional hollowness from shock began to fade as he lay there thinking, but only to be replaced by intense sorrow. His heart hurt so much as if it were being pulled apart. Saifah just couldn't understand it. Was he really so unlikeable a person? But Zon had seemed to be okay, happy even, around him lately. They were always laughing and messing around during guitar practice. Was it all fake? Zon was the one who had stopped telling him to leave him alone, or to go away whenever they met around campus. Why? If he hated him so much, why did he pretend otherwise?

Saifah buried his head in his arms. He just couldn't believe it. Had it all been an act? Had Zon been pretending to get along with him for the sake of the project? Going over his memories of all the times they had been together lately, picturing how Zon would look at him and smile, only hurt Saifah more as tears began pouring down his cheeks. Why had Zon acted so friendly with him if in truth he couldn't stand him? Giving him such false hopes. It was too cruel.

After crying it out, Saifah lay on his back and stared up at his ceiling with sore red eyes. After thinking about it, he couldn't blame Zon. He had been pressured into doing something he didn't want to do with someone he didn't like. Zon had just been trying to make things easier for the both of them so they could get through the performance without bringing past conflicts into it. Though, knowing Zon had been so stressed out from having to be around him hurt like hell. He never intended to make Zon suffer. He'd only wanted for them to get a little closer, but it seems it was never meant to be. Perhaps it was finally time to put away his unrequited love, as that is all it will ever be.