Show me the way

Chapter 2: Emerald eyes

Three weeks since he's gone. Three weeks since i didn't go to school. Three weeks since i didn't smile. Not that I ever was a smiley person but when Noah was around I always had a smile on my face.

My phone hasn't stop ringing since the funerals and I didn't plan on answering. I know that my friends are worried about me but they can't do anything. They can't take the pain away. They can't bring him back. Same goes for my parents they are trying to understand but they can't. They barely were here when Noah was alive, always doing work stuff (stuff that were more important than us apparently), and now that Noah is gone it's like they're always there. Never leaving me alone, like I'm a child in needed supervision. Always knocking on my door asking if I'm okay, trying to have a conversation.

"Knock, knock honey. Can I come in?" My moms asked too sweetly. My mother was the living proof of trying too hard. "Yes mom, no problem." That was a lie. It was a problem, she was a problem. My parents we're a problem. Me and Noah always been a problem to them and they we're my problem now.
"Honey we need to talk." My mom said opening the door. And I nodded I never was much of a talker. " We got a call from our company in Thailand they need us to check some things we're leaving for five weeks." She didn't seem happy with it. I guess that was good. Still, I didn't like it. As much as I didn't like my parents annoying me for the pass three weeks, trying to get me to talk it was always better that those thoughts inside my head reminding me of Noah. Always better than being completely alone."Okay." I said emotionless.
"Honey you know we love you. I know Noah's dead really affected you. It affected us all but you need to start going to school again." When my mom spoke those words I froze. School. I didn't want to go. I didn't want to see pity in my classmates eyes. I didn't want to deal with the questions. I didn't want people asking me how he died. I didn't want to remember and that's all those people would do. Reminding me that it was my fault that Noah died. "No mom." I said my voice breaking. "You know I can't go." I was going to cry. I knew I was. "Honey I know it's hard but Noah wouldn't want you to..." She did not just go there. "Stop it!" I screamed. "Don't tell me what Noah would want or what Noah wouldn't want. You didn't know your own freaking son." I said my voice becoming a whisper. "You couldn't possibly know what he would want." At this point I was crying. I didn't like to cry. It made me feel weak. That weakness got Noah killed. "They're is no room for discussion Kylie." I saw it in her eyes. I hurt her with my words. That was probably the only thing I had from her. Her pale grey eyes. It was impossible not to know what she was feeling since we had the same ones. But I won't apologize to her she never apologize to me. To Noah. "You're going to go back to school and Monica and her son are going to be living with you the time that me and your father are gone. I'm not leaving you alone in the house." Funny. She never cared before. "Whatever." Very mature of me. "You know we love you." And like that she was gone.

Monica was my mother's best friend since kindergarten. We never really talked. Her and my mother did things together but I never really got to talk to her. Not that I mind. Like I said earlier, I never was much of a talker. I knew she had a son Joe, Joey, Joah or something like that. Last time I saw Monica was at my brother's funeral. Her son wasn't there. Actually I never really saw him. I remember playing with him when we we're younger (we are around the same age) but after that he stop coming with his mom. I don't really know why. I don't really care either. And I had more important things to worry about. Like me going back to school. Like me having to talk to my friends again. Acting like everything was fine, like my brother didn't just die. Well my brother always told me that I was good at pretending.

My grumbling stomach interrupted my train of thoughts. I got out of bed, got a quick look in the mirror. And let me tell you, it was awful. My hair sticking out from everywhere, dark rings under my eyes, my face was paler than usual. Let just say that I looked like shit. But my parents we're gone. They told me goodbye earlier before heading to their plane (surprisingly they didn't forget me) and they're wasn't anybody in the house so I decide to go in the kitchen looking like the Joker.

I had to pass Noah's room to go in the kitchen and I hated it. I could still see him. See myself reading him those ridiculous story about dinosaurs saving humans life. See myself laughing at the little comments he made while I was reading the stories. I hated knowing I would never be able to do that again.

I didn't even realize I was in front of the fridge when I heard footsteps behind me. I turn around without thinking of my awful look. I gasped when I saw deep emerald eyes looking directly in my grey ones. "Well you must be Kylie." He said with a deep voice. They always had deep voices. I nodded not being able to talk So this good looking guy was Monica son. Good looking? Did I really just thought that? I didn't need that at the moment. Guys we're the least of my worries. "Nice hair by the way." He said smirking. Oh shit I had forgotten about them. "Uhmm thanks I guess." I said trying to straighten them. As you can guess it didn't work. "I'm Josiah." So his name was Josiah not Joah or Joey . It suited him. "Good for you. " I said going back to my room without looking at him. I could hear him chuckle though. I don't get what was so funny.

Back in my bed with my ketchup chips and Ice tea there was only one thought in my mind. In the little time that I talk to Josiah I didn't one time think about how Noah was dead because of me. That was the first time since the accident.

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Hey! Thanks again for reading my story. I know there's a lot of grammars errors and stuff but thanks for reading anyway:). Let a comment or a vote it would really make me happy. Have a good day!!

Me🌸