Dramione Diary: SEASON 1- Hermione Version | COMPLETED

Entry 13

A.N.- ALL RIGHTS BELONG TO JK ROWLING AND I OWN NOTHING EXCEPT MY MISTAKES.

August 28, 1998

Dear Diary,

Let's continue from where we left off earlier, shall we? As I won't be able to concentrate much on anything else if I don't get this happiness, or whatever it is, off my chest.

So, Malfoy was nervous when he and Blaise asked us if they could join our party. It was weird that the smirk that frequently used to appear on his face was like wiped off of it now. As if he didn't find it pleasurable anymore to keep it on as he used to. At every damn occasion.

Seamus and Dean were more than just surprised by Malfoy and Blaise offering to sit with us. Angelina was just surprised about the fact that Slytherins wanted to get along with Gryffindors. That just made me happier. Maybe this was going to be the foundation to break the stereotype that Gryffindors and Slytherins can never get along, leave alone being friends. I felt warm and happy. After so long, I felt blessed that I was alive after the war. After so long I felt so good and different after the breakup with Ronald.

Malfoy took a seat just across mine between Blaise (who had sat down first after arranging two chairs from the nearest table). Harry asked him how they even found out where we were going. Well, of course they overheard us! Harry sometimes is too much naïve and innocent, no? Anyways, after explaining everything about my parents' case and Malfoy's help in it, Seamus and Dean were finally at ease sitting with them both. Honestly, before that, they looked like they were afraid of getting a Sectumsempra spell by either of the two Slytherins. It was weird. Moving on, the conversation started awkwardly but soon went on to become interesting and deep. Malfoy told us something that moved me. He told us that Lucius Malfoy being a former Death Eater and a great supporter of Voldemort was put to go through hell when his final punishment was determined to be a Dementor's kiss. It is worse than death. Narcissa wasn't given such a harsh punishment even though she worked closely with them but according to Malfoy, she didn't really like working like that. She and his dad often argued over this serious matter but Lucius being a fierce man always won. She was forced to work with them under his influence and to protect Bellatrix Lestrange, her only sister she could keep an eye on and maybe even save. Narcissa now was under such great depression that even the best Healers aren't able to cure her as of now. His expressions when he talked of Lucius were of pain but more than that, they were of relief. Maybe he also was under too much burden of his father. He was pained of course, he was his father after all who suffered something as terrible as that. When he talked about Narcissa, however, the expressions were deep. He was silently suffering alone. I could feel it even when he never talked about how exactly he was suffering. We were amazed at how he opened up to us. He sorted this too. He said he always had wanted friends like these. He lived practically all alone till now. Till he met us again. He said that he wanted friends like Harry had me and Ron. Even though he disliked us, he had always envied our friendship which made him repel us even more as he could never fit in with us. The only true friend he had was Blaise (who had been sitting quietly till now, feeling more than awkward), and even they became close only recently.

Then suddenly he looked at me. I felt something unreal. I was so moved till now that I didn't realize I had tears in my eyes. I quickly wiped them and faced another direction. I somehow didn't know how to face him like this. It frustrated me. But the feeling of having someone new and entirely different and so deep and mysterious to think about was so beyond imaginary. I felt renewed again. Capable of falling in love again. Thinking of all this, he was still staring at me. I caught his intense gaze. His exact words were "Hermione, I apologize again for everything. I helped you not just as an apology but for myself too. I wanted to do something for you in that matter as I had myself felt everything you were going through. We were going through different conditions, yet the essence of both was the same. I have almost lost both my parents. I wanted to give you back yours as I know the feeling and I know this was the best thing I could do for you and to convince you all that I genuinely wanna change." Yes, I didn't memorise but most of the lines were same. I quoted it as I know this is how you can feel the depth of what he said. I was moved to the core. The feeling was so deep. I couldn't even utter an "it's okay" because the words were stuck in my throat but there was a lump therein too.

The atmosphere had deepened and become intense. Ginny decided to break it by consoling Malfoy and telling that it must be hard for him to near all that alone since she was also a lonely kid at first. Maybe they could relate to each other. Then somehow the conversation went on with school things and that's how we parted on a much lighter note.

On reaching home, I was having a different feeling. I guess I had never felt like that before. It was exciting. It was deep. It was like a feeling of another world. I felt like I was having a crush on a mysterious man called Draco Malfoy! God save me!

Yours, Hermione