The Other Side of the Window

Thanksgiving for the Shepherds has always been family-centric. When Derek's father died, him and the whole Shepherd clan celebrated Thanksgiving in the cemetery to honor his father. When he was thirty-five, he and Addison catered Thanksgiving for the whole Shepherd clan because the day before Thanksgiving, his mother broke her hand. That year of course was the birth of the Hotdog Thanksgiving. A lot of yelling and blaming happened that Thanksgiving but still, it didn't lose its essence, it still was about family. Which brings Derek to where he is now – home in New York for a Shepherds Thanksgiving Celebration.

Admittedly, he hasn't attended one in years. He wasn't there for two consecutive years when he and Addison were still married because he chose work over family. And he certainly didn't appear to celebrate Thanksgiving – or any other celebration – there after the divorce. But now is different, he and Meredith were slightly on the rocks because of his choice to pursue a trial in DC and he needed something familiar.

That's why when Nancy had called him to ask if he wanted to come that year, he immediately said yes. To say that Nancy (or his mother) was surprised that he'd accepted the invitation was an understatement; yes, they were hopeful but they didn't count on it too much. Because well, Derek hasn't stepped foot in his mother's home in years. He hasn't stepped foot in New York since the night he abandoned the city and his life.

But whatever surprise his family felt didn't compare to the surprise that he felt when he walked in the foyer of his mother's home that cold Thanksgiving Day. Close to the fireplace, Addison was sitting – well, Addison, Jake and their kids were sitting there looking through at what he could only assume was a photo album from med school.

He didn't know why but as he saw their faces, a dull pain crept on his chest. Addison was happy – really genuinely happy. And he got to admit that it's been a long time since he saw her that happy, he hasn't seen that smile in years. Not even when they were still married. And even though he's glad she's happy, something inside of him hurts. Addison's happy, but she's happy without him. Derek knows they've all moved on and he shouldn't feel that way but it just didn't sit right with him.

And just when he thought that the aching feeling of hurt couldn't get any worse, it did...

"Mama, look!" He heard as Henry tugs on his mother to get her attention. "Pretty girl." He smiles widely, pointing to a photo.

Derek doesn't need to look to know which photo he was pointing to because the adjective that Henry used to describe his mother (not that he knew that it was Addison in the photo) was the same words that he used that day. Pretty girl, it's alright. I'm here, you're okay.

Addison's laugh caught his attention as she too looked at the photo, "Do you know who that is, Henry?"

"No." Henry shakes his head. "But she's a really pretty girl."

"Well, pretty girl says thank you to you." Addison smiles, holding her son close. "That's mommy when she was still in med school, Henry."

"Really?" Derek hears Henry ask; his voice laced with fascination. Henry looked down at the photo then back again to his mother, causing Addison to laugh again.