I hate giving directions. Then again, I can't really talk to people so no wonder I can't give directions. I had to give directions to a taximan yesterday on a shitty phone which only works on loudspeaker and the guy had a really strong Irish accent so that didn't really help, especially when he went 'WHA?!' every five seconds making me feel even more awkward. I was outside in the pouring rain waiting for a taxi and I had to give him directions to where I have my music lesson. Not only is it hard to give directions, but I am also stuck in the middle of nowhere, wanting to go to the middle of nowhere where my house is apparently situated at.
This is how the conversation went in my mind.
"Er, where you at?"
"The music centre."
"Where's da?"
"Er....y'know where the Brass Monkey pub is?"
Yes there is legit, a pub called the Brass Monkey.
"No."
"Err *insessant stalling* do y'know where the massive Tesco's is?"
"No."
This is where I panicked and said the only thing that popped into my head.
"I'm looking at a fricking massive lit up white church. I'm near there on the opposite side of the road, freezing my ass off."
"OK." *hung up*
Seriously?! He got that?!
On the way back was worse.
"How far up the road are you?"
"Err...pretty far?"
Jeez I suck at directions. But I got £1 off my payment which is something, right?
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How To Irritate A Pirate
RandomTitle is self explanatory and consists entirely of my own opinion. If you feel I should add something then feel free to add your suggestions in the comment section. This is a random rant book thingy which I decided to start because I felt like it. A...
