You sit across from the washing machine. Staring at the swirl of fabric through the window.
The rhythmic thump of machinery was almost cathartic to listen to.
Sighing you held your knees to your chest.
Those dirty sheets and clothes were tossed in quickly, so you could distract yourself from turmoil.
But once you sat on the tiled flooring, you couldn't help but curl up like you were losing warmth.
What do you do?
_________________________________________
Hotch was on another case and you were left to watch over Jack, as Jessica had a work emergency.
It was a peaceful evening, and you were reading to put him in a peaceful rest as always.
Once reaching the end of the second chapter, you heard a small yawn from his tiny pink mouth.
Heavy eyelids struggled as his head went down into the pillow.
His adorable small figure left your heart feeling enlarged by the sweetness of his sleepy face.
You closed the book, and tucked him in snugly, pushing his hair back to kiss his temple.
You turned off the lamp, and his room glowed blue from his nightlight.
You smile and say in the gentlest tone, "Sweet dreams, Jack."
He responds sleepily,
"G'night, mommy.."
You keep the gasp from leaving, as you respond as normal as possible.
"Good night Jack."
Closing the door behind you, you calm the beating heart of yours and return the book to its shelf.
You sit on the couch and contemplate, staring at the blank tv screen.
I know who you pretend I am
_________________________________________
He was finally back from the case, and you looked forward to holding him again... you even went to the extent of doing your makeup after he called.
As the night went on after Jack was assuredly out for the night and the lock on, you were aggressively kissing him.
Smearing cherry red lipstick against his pink lips while his hand grip your hips
And one article of clothing after the other kept flying off.
To the point where he was behind you, and grinding at an excruciatingly hot pace.
You only got excited and groaned as his pace went quicker with your hips grinding back.
"Fuxk..." he hissed. "Haley- I-"
He groans, completely unaware of his words.
A stream of obscenities as he reaches completion and your heart drops.
You reached nothing, as your fingers threaded through strands of his hair.
I know who you pretend I am
He continues on, helping you reach climax.
You squeeze your eyes closed and felt it with every thrust distracting you from the mental annihilation.
You were fulfilled with pleasure and moaned loudly to show it, but your heart was achingly empty.
You always thought so, but this night only confirmed it.
_________________________________________
Aaron was at work.
Jack was spending time with Jessica after school today.
And you were just here.
You moved from facing the washing machine filled with the weeks' dirty laundry, to leaning your head against the loudly thumping machine.
The rhythm of cleaning clothes vibrates through your skull.
It was soothing to your headache.
Who were you? A replacement?
Do Me Ti
Why not me
Why not me
Beep!Beep!
The laundry was done and you couldn't help but crave the thumping of the machine again. A release to this inexplicable feeling.
But chores were undone, and life goes on.
You took the wet clothes to the dryer and set it to heavy duty.
You placed the basket on top of the dryer.
The sound of rolling tires entering the driveway alert you.
You find your way to the front door.
Plastering a smile on your face as you straighten out your furrowed brows.
You wipe away at your eyes and open the door, looking happy as can be.
He stands in front of you, tall, and you put your arms around him.
"I missed you, Aaron. "
"So did I, Y/n."
You kissed him, leaving a wine red print of your lipstick on his lips, and lead him inside, smiling painfully hard.
Hoping to fill that hole in your heart.
