Reki pov:
Today I was watching Langa and Miya skate. I sadly couldn't skate with them because my leg hurts so much, I can't even describe it. It's like my leg is falling apart. When I was a kid I sometimes would complain about this pain in my right leg but the doctor always said that it's 'cause I am still growing.
Well, if he says so, he must be right I guess.
Anyways, I also feel so hot, my heart is racing and I am sweating a bit. At first I thought I was sick but medicine didn't help, my temperature is normal and I only feel my heart racing when I am around Langa.
I am not dumb, I soon realized that I have a crush on him.
I always knew that I was a bit different, that I like boys and girls. Not only that, but I also sometimes feel more feminine, I can't describe it but sometimes I just feel like wearing a dress or a bit of make-up. I even started to wear eyeliner almost everyday, I think it looks nice. Sometimes I feel like I'm in the wrong body but sometimes I feel like I am in the right body.
The only person I have talked to about my feelings is miya. He was surprisingly serious about this. I thought he'd call me "stupid slime" again. He was extremely supportive and understanding, turns out that he is pan and sometimes feels like he is too feminine, that bothers him and he is insecure. We talked for a long time and got to know each other better.
I really appreciate Miya as a friend, even if he is a bit mean sometimes he still is very nice.
Looks like Langa and Miya are coming back.
I stand up and walk over to them. We laugh a little and talk for a while but my leg hurts so bad today, I just wonder why.
Langa pov:
I feel sorry for Reki. It must really hurt if he can't skate anymore. He also looks a bit sad.
I look at him. He's talking to Miya.
The last few weeks he canceled a lot if our plans and started to talk to miya even more than before. They keep something from me and I wanna know what's so important and private that they can't tell me.
I know I shouldn't stick my nose into Rekis business but I want to know everything about him, everything he does and everything he feels. I just feel so jealous. Jealous that Miya gets to know Rekis secrets and that he gets to spend so much time with Reki.
I know this sound weird but I am madly in love with him.
When I was about 14 or 15 I realized that I am gay. I never loved a girl, always had a crush on boys and overall never wanted to be in a relationship with a girl. Then I met Reki and felt my heart racing.
I love everything about him. His smile, his fluffy hair and how he isn't afraid of anyone or anything. I adore him so much, sometimes I wish I was Reki.
The only thing that worries me is that I don't want to have sex with him or anyone. I don't like the thought of sexual intercourse, I don't like to watch other people having sex and it makes me uncomfortable. But isn't it normal for boys my age to have sexual feelings?
I sometimes wonder if this is normal or not. Maybe I should talk to reki about this? Yes, I will talk to him and tell him everything. I will also confess to him.
But what if he thinks I am weird? No. He won't think that, he is intelligent and tolerant, or?
