I thought I rid a disturbance.
Our memories,
Forcing me to feel the numbness from your absence.
Though no love existed around you.
Only regret and envy
Insults you'd say weren't true.
Sharp pained memories of you grabbing my hips
Squeezing my ribs,
Telling me I am your imperfections
And that I am what you decide I am.
You never gave a damn.
You give no apologies.
And when you do,
They are nothing but alibis.
Excuses to please your fragile ego
And cover your lies
So it doesn't shatter into pieces where you can't hide.
Always a sacrifice,
Either loneliness or a fool's paradise.
I can't pretend anymore
that it's not nipping away my core
There's no way to hide.
No more flaunting fake pride
There is no escape,
heartache is near.
But, better than being numb
That is my biggest fear.
Stuck in stilled relationships,
Nothing but tongue twisted words from my lips
faking the passion and interaction
to maintain a superficial satisfaction.
They pulled me under their calm masked surface
And stripped me of my happiness
Just a hopeless, wandering mess
Can I go back in time with you, try to convince myself
That it was better,
Beautiful, bright, sunny weather,
No meaningless tears,
Your friendly laughter falling over my ears
Holding my hand through these fading years.
Time isn't a healer,
It numbs the mind to make unwanted memories whither
YOU ARE READING
Somber, Melancholy, and Bittersweet (A Collection of Poems)
Poetry"And I am sad. And I am mad. The maddest you can be, But with love as deep as the sea, As warm as the summer sky, Caressing like the moon in the night." --Written in moments of strong emotion
