𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫

𝐢𝐭 𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐭𝐬

does it hurt
sitting there alone?
does it ache
watching me walk away
with dignity and
every piece of myself?
is it hard to tell
people that i'm the one
that got away?
do you still see me when
you look into her eyes?
does it still haunt you
knowing i moved on?
do you ever recall my face
in the middle of
sleepless nights when the
air seems just right
as it did on that night?
does it pain you to
see photographs of me?
i hope it does.
because it hurts
watching myself fall apart
in bathroom mirrors
and beneath bedsheets in
the heat of summer nights.
it pains me to resist
texting you because you've
run out of chances.
it aches sobbing for so long
that i can't sob any longer
and i am empty.
i wanted it to be you.
i wanted to feel your hands
resting on my hips and your
eyes on me.
but there was a different set
of blue eyes that night.
and maybe that's what hurts
the most for the both of us.

may 17th, 2021